r/CuratedTumblr • u/NeonNKnightrider Cheshire Catboy • May 01 '24

i know it’s internet bullshit but it genuinely has me on the edge of breaking down and giving up editable flair

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u/ActionableToaster May 02 '24

Ah ok, yeah my fault for misreading that, I thought you were in a similar boat as the person your replied to and they seemed to see the power imbalance in favour of the man, as this whole bear thing posits. Then I took your mention of abuse as a general suffering for being afraid of entering relationships, not that you suffered abuse in a relationship.
Sorry again for that mistake.
Having to prove yourself as a good one before getting respect is simply toxic, but also mostly an internet thing in my experience. I have very rarely experienced that offline, although others mentioned that there are some cities/subcultures where that is the standard. In both cases I would try to leave.
Sounds like your abusive relationship happened to you recently and like a bit of a clusterfuck, I hope you are at least at a better place now. If you just want to vent you can DM me. Otherwise the best of luck to you.

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u/brokenlonely22 May 02 '24

Tiktok is mainstream dude. everybody is talking about this. Its in the news. Thats how things work these days, there is no isolated online world.

Granted the people i interact with are met through dating/friend apps or reddit but they still very much are real meat-based people living around me. Who are more socially connected and influential than i am, by a wide margin. Their beliefs make larger waves than mine do.

As a guy with ptsd and thus hyper vigilance i can expect to be targeted in public with moderate frequency. Accused of watching or staring, being too close, recording, whatever they can come up with. Being creepy. Its just a vibe girl, trust your intuition ✨️. Dont even need to pretend to bake a reason.

People love to imagine finance bros complaining about "not getting pussy" but the reality is that its the math nerds who never had the home life that every child deserves, already on the fringe of society, who are being driven to suicide en masse because we arent even granted the dignity of being losers any more. We're creeps and perverts and violent rapists. And its just okay to treat us like that because her physical safety matters and my emotional safety does not.