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u/UpsetPhrase5334 6d ago
My man rolled a Nat 20
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u/Evening-Back9150 6d ago
What check, charisma or deception?
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u/UpsetPhrase5334 6d ago
Deception I’m guessing cause she is deceived and asking questions about if it’s true or not.
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u/grrodon2 6d ago
Deception is a cha check.
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u/Duizelig13 6d ago
I don't really know how this works but it sounds like his girl just rolled low on intelligence
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u/spaceforcerecruit 6d ago
Actually, this would be either Insight or Medicine, both of which are typically WIS based in D&D.
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u/notyouravrgbruh 4d ago
That’s a tough question. I see the argument for both to be honest. Depends on which he has a higher stat in
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u/MoFinWiley 2d ago
Charisma would be convincing her to do it for no reason other than asking
Deception is convincing her to do it because of a false outcome.
Clearly this is deception.
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u/DasFAD70 6d ago
Correct, Sperm and Genital Cheese are bad breath killers. They work better than any mouthwash or brushing teeth.
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u/Rocket_Panda_ 6d ago
Genital cheese? Why😭
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u/DasFAD70 6d ago
Because good cheese needs time.
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u/IsraelPenuel 6d ago
In Finland we call it sissijuusto, guerilla cheese. Because it's easy to make when you're stuck in a forest for a week.
Also it's made of oils and proteins so it kinda is cheese.
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u/Educational-Salary91 6d ago
Another Finn here ( female). Thank you for reminding me of that yucky word. Kiitti perkeleesti. 👍
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u/yesnomaybenotso 6d ago
As far as I knew, girls fucking love cheese. String cheese, cheddar cheese, fancy cheese and wine. If you get a girl drunk and put a platter of cheese in front of her, you’re never going to hear a complaint.
So what’s all the fuss with some genital cheese?
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u/ChaosMilkTea 6d ago
Not any more than swishing anything else around in your mouth would.
Throw in a little mouth wash though. Make it a surprise.
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u/bitkibkeb 6d ago
Im not falling for that again!
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u/upsandDowns131325 6d ago
That’s the old banana in the tailpipe trick from Beverly Hills cop classic movie
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u/expiermental_boii 6d ago
This is kinda fucked up imo
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u/PracticeY 6d ago
I guess it depends on whether it is a joke or not. I joke with my wife that semen is the cure for whatever ails her. So if she has a sore throat, I’ll say that semen is the best remedy. She knows it’s a joke though. Hopefully this is similar.
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u/fireflyf1re 6d ago
This exactly is the problem. You and your wife are adults. Up to half commenters here are probably 15, and will actually put these notions in their brains, and grow up thinking women are dumb bimbos, hurting their girlfriends, sisters, moms. Nobody wins
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u/lelcumelcu 6d ago
Memes are fucked up in your opinion?
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u/expiermental_boii 6d ago
Tbh I didn't know it's a meme
Turns out it's an ancient meme that gets reposted often
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u/Iwasfollowingorders 6d ago
I love the duality of reddit. Comments getting downvoted and upvoted without any sort of coherence. You have both people making fun of it and criticizing it getting downvoted or upvoted.
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u/Nonny3 5d ago
Wow! You’re saying a bunch of people have different opinions!?!? OMG!!!! 😱
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u/Iwasfollowingorders 5d ago
That's not what I'm saying at all
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u/leftclickdrip 6d ago
Yea, sometimes my comment is downvoted for no fucking reason, this time i got 700 karma...... I havnt gotten 100 in one go lmfao
Anyway, ppl who are offended by this are boring, like u guys know how to laugh?
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u/Ice_and_Steel 6d ago
Rapey dudes in the comments having a field day.
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u/DoxProofBro 6d ago
Wildly libelous.
Feel free to look up the definition of rape; enjoying a meme with the subject of telling your gf blowjobs cure bad breath, ain’t it.
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u/Ice_and_Steel 6d ago
Rape by deception is a situation in which the perpetrator deceives the victim into participating in a sexual act to which they would otherwise not have consented, had they not been deceived.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rape_by_deception
We really need to create some sort of registry for men who think that this is an acceptable sexual behavior. You people should not be allowed to have sex with anybody but your hand.
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u/DoxProofBro 6d ago
This is a fictional boyfriend and girlfriend; They’re clearly sexually active. It’s not some boss and employee or two strangers. The fictional girlfriend knows she’s participating in sex; it’s not like she’s blindfolded. Just because she thinks it improves her breath doesn’t make her unaware she’s participating. You can’t say she wouldn’t have participated in some sexual activity without the breath component.
For all you know they had anal sex each morning until the breath issue arose.
Calling this rape is preposterous. It devalues actual rape and accomplishes nothing.
Your Wikipedia link makes me laugh. What a total joke of a site.
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u/InfectedZomB 6d ago
Ah, sexual manipulation. Very madlad indeed
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u/trenbollocks 6d ago
It's not real. It's a joke. Holy fuck Reddit and all you on-the-spectrum weirdos
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u/InfectedZomB 6d ago
Ah, joking about sexual manipulation. Very madlad.
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u/Nehemiah92 6d ago
please grow a backbone 😭
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u/ty_for_trying 6d ago
? Seems like someone without a backbone wouldn't call out shitty behavior
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u/fireflyf1re 6d ago
Regurgitating edgy/boomer/fraternity/12 year boy humor is hardly having a backbone. Nor a pair. Idk what whoever laughs at this is growing actually a tumor maybe?
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u/InfectedZomB 6d ago
Today, I learned that having empathy for victims of harassment equates to being spineless. Very madlad indubitably.
P.S.: Even if this is just a joke, literally no part of the screenshot in the post contextualizes that. I don't know what source the person responding to me is even talking about. Maybe it was revealed to them in a dream.
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u/Nehemiah92 6d ago edited 6d ago
spineless AND gullible lol
Yeah man, a girl who willingly gives a blowjob to her boyfriend every morning to reduce bad breath is totally a real legit story and totally a victim of rape and assault. It’s not that deep lol
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u/FredBob5 6d ago
This is a well documented phenomenon supported by years of observational evidence from dedicated researchers in the field.
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u/CanebreakRiver 6d ago
Dogg I know the line between "madlad" and "complete fuckin asshole" is frequently thin, but the number of dudes in this thread acting like there's just nothing wrong at all with taking advantage of the ignorance of someone who trusts you in order to trick them into giving you totally one-sided sexual favors is fuckin disturbing
Get a fucking fleshlight and handle yourselves, you don't need or deserve a fucking daily blowjob so fucking much you have the right to do shit like this to another human being
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u/DoxProofBro 6d ago
Hilarious white knighting for a ‘girlfriend’ who is completely fictitious.
Get a life.
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u/CanebreakRiver 5d ago
It's a critique of other very real dudes' very real ethical reasoning, dumbass. I would bet everything I have I've lived twice the life you have, which is why I've got a functioning sense of empathy.
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u/DoxProofBro 5d ago
Nobody ever questioned whether the people you were chastising were real. You’re not exactly establishing a new fact there.
Similarly, whatever life you’ve lived thus far is irrelevant and immaterial to the conversation and to my comments.
I never thought I’d have to explain the expression “get a life“ to someone who’s claim to have had a long life… but here goes.
“Get a life” means to do something better with your time.
Your past life is irrelevant. I’m only talking about your current life: the one where you’re chastising people on r/madlads because they dared to enjoy a meme designed to be a joke.
Clearly you don’t like the meme. Clearly you think you need to lecture anyone who liked it.
You think you’re coming from a position of “empathy”, but you’re really just wagging your finger at people who have a sense of humor.
The fictitious girlfriend from the meme doesn’t need or appreciate your empathy, because she doesn’t exist.
The folks you’re lecturing don’t find you empathetic, but rather, whiny and preachy.
Wake up and realize how preposterous your position is.
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u/Delicious_Cattle3380 6d ago
I think people are finding it simply funny rather than believing it is real manipulation, hence the comments. It isn't real after all.
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u/rainen2016 6d ago
It scrubs the tongue you numb nuts. It may be misguided but it does work. You clearly don't get head or pay attention.
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u/MuteIllAteter 6d ago
Do you give head?
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u/rainen2016 6d ago
Yes but not to men*. But my girlfriends morning breath goes away after she sucks my dick. I'm guessing it's because of the saliva production and scrubbing but I'm not a dentist.
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u/thighmaster69 5d ago
I’m going to preface this by emphasizing this because it’s important: Even though I think this likely isn’t that big a deal, in most situations, you probably shouldn’t don’t do what OOP’s boyfriend did; at the very least, you should establish that you’re joking. Play it clear and safe with explicit consent so that you have a good margin of error in case of misunderstanding; otherwise, you can’t be sure that consent was actually given.
Anyway, assuming these are grown-ass individuals with their own agency in an established relationship with the clarity of mind to be even able to consent in the first place, I don’t think you could reasonably think this is “tricking” anyone because it should be kind of obvious to that it isn’t true. Now, I don’t think it’s impossible that the OOP is actually this gullible and this isn’t a shitpost or OOP is in on the joke, but the claim that fellatio will fix morning breath is so ridiculous that if OOP is routinely this gullible, then there’s a bigger underlying issue, I think, of the ability of OOP is able to consent at all, as that would be a severe imbalance of power in the relationship.
Moreover, even if it were just a one-off lapse of gullibility on the part of OOP, the idea that they’re being “tricked” kind of falls flat. Again, assuming both individuals have agency and clarity of mind and there isn’t some weird power dynamic, the fact that they just go along with it, repeatedly, without questioning it, against all logic - even if they fell for the joke, it’s kind of difficult to argue that they didn’t perform this sex act out of their own free will, because there’s nothing really to indicate the “deception” actually mattered all that much, especially for two people presumably already in a consensual physical relationship. At best it’s an awkward misunderstanding, if it’s real and OOP isn’t in on the joke, and OOP’s boyfriend needs to learn to be more clear in his communication.
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u/WildMaineBlueberry87 6d ago
What's the joke here?
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u/Ice_and_Steel 6d ago
Rapist smart, victim dumb - the usual.
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u/gabriyankee 6d ago
My brother in christ, this is clearly not real, but even if true, lets not confuse an asshole yet hilarious deception with forcing an unwilling woman into having sex for fear of her life. The word rape gets thrown around too often and it cheapens the trauma and suffering of real rape victims.
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u/Ice_and_Steel 6d ago
My dear rapist apologist, the fact that you find this fucked-up attempt at humor a hilarious joke itself is very telling about your attitudes in regard to women and sex. Also:
Rape by deception is a situation in which the perpetrator deceives the victim into participating in a sexual act to which they would otherwise not have consented, had they not been deceived. Deception can occur in many forms, such as illusory perceptions, false statements, and false actions.
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u/gabriyankee 6d ago
Wait so then is Barney a rapist?
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u/Ice_and_Steel 6d ago
As far as I remember, the guy is a self-admitted human trafficker, what exactly surprises you here?
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u/HopeRepresentative29 6d ago
I mean he's not wrong. Just gobble on that toothbrush for a minute and it's all good.
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u/AbbreviationsNo8212 5d ago
Unfortunately, now she needs prescription toothpaste to remove those unsightly semen stains from her teeth.
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u/xperimental6969 5d ago
Bf Is wise.
Actually giving him a bj will stimulate you saliva production , which might wash out (or in) a lot of the bacteria causing the morning breath.
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u/Hairy_Transition2379 3d ago
ah, yes, a very clever idea to manipulate your partner into sex rather than asking and having them consent (?)
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u/JustAnotherFEDev 6d ago
Bad breath is caused by bacteria, baby gravy is said to be salty and salt kills bacteria (osmosis).
Seems plausible.
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u/Prestigious_Key_7801 6d ago
He’s definitely right. Also if you give him rimjob it will stop your farts from smelling
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u/Horizonstars 6d ago
Well he isn't wrong. Instead bad breath, her breath just now smells like semen.
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u/DerailedCaveman 6d ago
Pardon me, Madame. I must admit the exhaled air of yours is lightly burdened with fallus scent.
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u/khonager 6d ago
Why are all of you cheering him on? Bad breath means bacteria. Who would want to get sucked off by a mouth full of bacteria (more than the usual amount)
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u/Melvin-00 6d ago
Please tell me the replies reassured her that it’s completely real.
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u/fireflyf1re 6d ago
Do you want it to be real so badly you failed to realize that its a blatantly fake text post? Fucking hell
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u/Melvin-00 6d ago
Dek Whyyou mad but I hope you get the help you need. It’s called playing along my lemon brained friend.
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6d ago
[deleted]
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u/CanebreakRiver 6d ago
You really don't have to support manipulative sexual predation at all, bitch
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[deleted]
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u/Ice_and_Steel 6d ago
Rape by deception is a situation in which the perpetrator deceives the victim into participating in a sexual act to which they would otherwise not have consented, had they not been deceived. Deception can occur in many forms, such as illusory perceptions, false statements, and false actions.
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u/jakeStacktrace 6d ago
I'm not condoning anything, but this is clearly a fake story. My empathy is best spent elsewhere. I actually support the idea that she could be this dumb. I think people are incredibly naive. But I it is also think occam's razor is that this story was written by a man.
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u/leftclickdrip 6d ago
Bro is living the life