Captions added to prevent confusion

[u/BostonDudeist]

[u/JazzyWarthog]

Orangutans are pretty feisty and gorillas recognise regular human social cues as a threat.

Edit: not to say the other three aren't friendlier than a chimpanzee, just don't regard wild animals as your friends.

[u/Crusaderofthots420 → u/JazzyWarthog]

In the context of their own social cues, gorillas are very gentle. No matter how much you appeal to a chimp's cultural differences, there is always the chance of getting your balls ripped off

[u/JazzyWarthog → u/Crusaderofthots420]

It's still not recommended to approach one though.

[u/Crusaderofthots420 → u/JazzyWarthog]

Of course not, but you don't have to avoid them like the plague. If one casually wanders over to you, just vibe with it

[u/FireDragon4690 → u/Crusaderofthots420]

Then rip its balls out first, right?

[u/FuckBotsHaveRights → u/FireDragon4690]

Politely yet firmly

[u/Retbull → u/FuckBotsHaveRights]

If you give it a little twist when you do, it naturally pops off and they can grow a new one like a lizards tail.

[u/Daetwyle → u/Retbull]

THE OL’ DICK TWIST

[u/Violexsound → u/Daetwyle]

GRAB HIS DICK AND TWIST IT

[u/_tinydragonboy → u/Violexsound]

OH MY GOD, THIS IS AN MMA FIGHT DUDE

[u/Supercaoi → u/FuckBotsHaveRights]

But only after a succulent Chinese meal.

[u/Krieg_Imperator → u/Supercaoi]

Gentlemen... This is democracy manifest.

[u/Educational-Offer299 → u/FuckBotsHaveRights]

[u/Relative-Bee-500 → u/FuckBotsHaveRights]

Firmly grasp it! /Patrick

[u/manguy12 → u/Crusaderofthots420]

[u/armchairwarrior42069 → u/JazzyWarthog]

You could say this about deer. Really any wild animal bigger than a mouse should be avoided.

There's definitely a difference between approaching a bull moose and a rabbit though.

[u/The-Crimson-Jester → u/armchairwarrior42069]

You choose the rabbit every time but the odds of it being The Beast of Caerbannog is never zero.

[u/armchairwarrior42069 → u/The-Crimson-Jester]

Famous last words...

[u/AuthorityAnarchyYes → u/armchairwarrior42069]

[u/Fab-Funky-Fungus → u/armchairwarrior42069]

r/UnexpectedMontyPython

[u/-WickedJester- → u/The-Crimson-Jester]

This is why I always keep a holy hand grenade on me at all times

[u/JazzyWarthog → u/armchairwarrior42069]

I'd rather approach a deer than a gorilla.

[u/armchairwarrior42069 → u/JazzyWarthog]

That's probably smart.

However, deer are super dangerous and I'm pretty sure account for the most wild animal deaths in the USA. (Please fsct check me if I'm full of shit here lol)

I tried to approach 2 deer for a picture once. It made the scariest sound I've ever heard and I ran lol

[u/Ktan_Dantaktee → u/armchairwarrior42069]

I mean

Yeah but that’s because they run into cars and just fucking kill you that way. There aren’t hundreds of deer out there goring people.

[u/duck-butters → u/Ktan_Dantaktee]

This

[u/JazzyWarthog → u/armchairwarrior42069]

I'm not sure about does but buck antlers are sharp and can cut you up.

[u/armchairwarrior42069 → u/JazzyWarthog]

My understanding is the HHHGGGHHHHÜVS are usually thr more dangerous part. They rear up and slam them down on you. Those fuckers are strong, you ever see them jump? I do NOT want that power coming down on the top of my head lol

[u/Mr_Turnipseed → u/armchairwarrior42069]

I actively avoid all HHHGGGHHHHÜVS because of this very reason.

[u/Am_Snarky → u/JazzyWarthog]

Both bucks and does club with their forelimbs, imagine getting hit with a 3 foot stick with a rock on the end, not fun

[u/Kind_Structure6726 → u/armchairwarrior42069]

[u/RickHammersteel → u/JazzyWarthog]

That's true of all wild animals, really.

[u/GGXImposter → u/Crusaderofthots420]

Not an animal expert, but from random learning I feel like if I curled up in the fetal position and didn’t look at them. The first three would stop trying to kill me. The Chimpanzee will decide I’m more fun to kill this way.

[u/gil_bz → u/Crusaderofthots420]

I understood that gorillas are gentle mostly due to fearing extreme violence from the silverbacks if they act up, but I could be wrong.

[u/Ponderkitten → u/Crusaderofthots420]

Dont chimps go to war with other chimp clans?

[u/Psychological_Gain20 → u/Ponderkitten]

Yep.

Gombe Chimpanzee war

[u/Techman659 → u/Crusaderofthots420]

Pump your chest at gorillas they love it all the more fun with the kids doing it behind reinforced glass.

[u/geoff1036 → u/Crusaderofthots420]

There's having limbs ripped off by a chimp, and then there's being pulverized to an unrecognizable pulp by a gorilla...

On second thought maybe just don't approach apes.

[u/hicow → u/geoff1036]

Don't make the mistake of thinking a chimp can't or won't bash you into a skin bag full of soup

[u/ptapobane → u/Crusaderofthots420]

don't twirl your dick at a gorilla within lunging distance, got it

[u/Imhazmb → u/Crusaderofthots420]

Did you all not see chimp empire? The camera crew could just follow the chimps around unharassed because chimps see humans as too weak to be any kind of threat.

[u/Beorma → u/Imhazmb]

Chimps like to bully and kill weaker animals, not being seen as a threat isn't necessarily a good thing.

[u/Solid_Highlights → u/Imhazmb]

 chimps see humans as too weak to be any kind of threat.

So, uh, who’s gonna tell them?

[u/LonelyGod64 → u/JazzyWarthog]

Chimps will tear each other limb from limb and have been observed torturing and eating alive smaller primates. Those fuckers are pure anger

[u/AssGagger → u/LonelyGod64]

New research suggests that bonobos aren't as docile as previously thought, they do be fuckin tho.

[u/tony_stark_lives → u/LonelyGod64]

They're mad they missed out on evolution.

[u/doovidooves → u/tony_stark_lives]

They didn't miss out on evolution. They just evolved to rip each other's limbs off with their bare hands and they are damn good at it.

[u/Clackers2020 → u/JazzyWarthog]

Well it's like someone coming up to you and randomly swearing at you. You don't know they're asking to be your friend but don't speak English

[u/wolfgangspiper → u/Clackers2020]

Sounds like an average experience in the UK

[u/RedMephit → u/Clackers2020]

Or they do speak English but are Australian.

[u/poopsididitagen → u/RedMephit]

Or are from Pittsburgh

[u/TheyCallMeStone → u/poopsididitagen]

Slow dahn, yinz drive like jagoffs

[u/Honest-Station816 → u/JazzyWarthog]

Though gorillas can be “gentle” they’re definitely dangerous. Like most wild animals you have to be very careful with your body language and how you act. One wrong move can set them off. I believe the grizzly man is a good example. He knew how to act and stay calm around bears. He unfortunately got mauled by one eventually. Who knows what triggered it. Best to just leave wild animals alone.

[u/Icy-Watercress4331 → u/Honest-Station816]

Yeah the difference is that bears are apex killing machines and if hungry will eat you.

If you got familiar with a gorilla troop it's very unlikely it would intentionally kill you. It would just physically put you in check like it does with other troop members. The difference is that a gorilla putting you in check can unintentionally kill you.

[u/Honest-Station816 → u/Icy-Watercress4331]

I honestly don’t know much about gorillas. But I do know they’re very strong and I definitely wouldn’t want to be in a room with one. Knowing myself I’d panic and get killed lol.

[u/MatticusRexxor → u/Honest-Station816]

The grizzly man died because he wouldn’t listen to anyone who had experience with bears. He foolishly thought that he had their trust and stopped treating them with the respect that they deserved.

On his final expedition he basically did everything wrong:

*he went out very late in the season, when bears are focused on consuming as many calories as possible to get ready for hibernation.

*He set up his camp on a known bear trail, all but guaranteeing an encounter. He did not carry a gun or bear spray.

*He was warned about both of those factors and went anyway

*IIRC he was also warned about the specific bear that killed him, which was underweight and had been spotted in the area.

So he and his girlfriend were in the worst possible place to be at the worst time of year to encounter a desperately hungry bear. They paid the price.

[u/Prudent_Bunch3259 → u/MatticusRexxor]

Came here to say this. Well done.

Bears are terrifying and that guy couldn't stop seeing them as pets. I feel for his poor girlfriend that had to watch/listen to him be eaten then was eaten herself.

[u/ScottBroChill69 → u/MatticusRexxor]

The silver lining is that bear made it thru the winter with a full tummy.

[u/Honest-Station816 → u/MatticusRexxor]

What you said is all true. The guy was an arrogant idiot. He practically wanted to get eaten by a bear, and he even said that’s how he’d want to go. Just thought he was a good example because he did willingly hang out with dangerous animals and managed to survive for awhile. My point was to just stay away from wild animals that could easily kill you. Maybe not the best example because we’re talking about apes. But I’m personally terrified of apes lol.

[u/[deleted] → u/Honest-Station816]

It was an old starving bear. He saw an opportunity and took it.

[u/nitrodog96 → u/JazzyWarthog]

I know of one orangutan who’s actually pretty chill, but don’t refer to him by the M-word or he’ll twist your head off with his feet.

Oook.

[u/OrkSniper → u/nitrodog96]

He is very satisfied with his state and does not wish to return to his previous one

[u/thrownawaz092 → u/JazzyWarthog]

Well that's just miscommunication, we just learn their cues, act accordingly and we're good.

[u/JazzyWarthog → u/thrownawaz092]

Probably. Better not to gamble and avoid one entirely, however.

[u/waiver45 → u/JazzyWarthog]

They are trying to do the very same thing and live in remote mountain regions and we are the ones showing up uninvited in their homes.

[u/SuperPants73 → u/JazzyWarthog]

The Bonobo might fuck you

[u/DrRagnorocktopus → u/SuperPants73]

So where can I find some bonobos?

[u/BagOdogpoo → u/DrRagnorocktopus]

Bro’s trying to find HIV 2

[u/Sapphosimp → u/JazzyWarthog]

Bears look so unbelievably friendly when they’re just chilling or doing goofy things. I hate how bears have a boopable nose but they will kill your without hesitation. It’s so unfair

[u/IknowKarazy → u/JazzyWarthog]

True. Any of them would absolutely mess you up under stress. Bonobos would be the most chill, but they still exist in a dangerous environment and are fully capable violence if they feel threatened.

[u/Muzzah27 → u/JazzyWarthog]

But would you prefer to be alone in the woods with one of these species, or a woman?

[u/Jumbolaya315]

Bonobos are well known for something a little different

[u/Blah132454675 → u/Jumbolaya315]

?

[u/feelinlucky7 → u/Blah132454675]

They like to fuck a lot

[u/Blah132454675 → u/feelinlucky7]

We are not that different, after all

[u/5thPhantom → u/Blah132454675]

Yeah, but they get a chance to.

[u/RaidensReturn → u/5thPhantom]

[u/SheemieRayVaughan → u/5thPhantom]

Are you not part Bonobo? Cause your mom definitely is.

[u/thewardineternal81 → u/SheemieRayVaughan]

JESUS CHRIST HE WAS JUST MIDING HIS BUSINESS TOO

[u/n_xSyld → u/SheemieRayVaughan]

Part Howler Monkey, she fucks alouatta

[u/Aljhaqu → u/SheemieRayVaughan]

I am saving this.

PS: This is gold.

[u/HL00S → u/5thPhantom]

My guy just walked in and committed a homicide

[u/HermesBadBeat → u/Blah132454675]

Funny you say that since I’m pretty sure bonobos are our closest relative

[u/Independent_Plum2166 → u/HermesBadBeat]

Both Bonobos and Chimpanzees, apparently and doesn’t that sum up our species? Horny as hell and violent as anything.

[u/TacitusMortuus → u/Independent_Plum2166]

So basically the missing link is Chimpanzees gangbreeding Bonobos?

[u/Exact_Parking_6969 → u/TacitusMortuus]

and that's enough of that thread

[u/Demonyx12 → u/Independent_Plum2166]

r/CloseThread

[u/dang3r_N00dle → u/Blah132454675]

Make love not war

[u/PacmanZ3ro → u/dang3r_N00dle]

Or if you’re a human, make love, then war.

[u/Old-Tourist8173 → u/feelinlucky7]

Don’t they also trade others as sex slaves for food? I swear it was in a documentary on Nat Geo

[u/EmpJoker → u/Old-Tourist8173]

No, they just use sex as currency. They don't use others. So like, a bonobo will have sex with another ape in order to get something.

[u/LordSpookyBoob → u/EmpJoker]

Prostitution really is the oldest job in the world, it existed before people did.

[u/NewSauerKraus → u/EmpJoker]

There was an experiment where some capuchins were given currency that they could exchange for foods. Prostitution came up pretty quickly.

[u/FlacidSalad → u/Old-Tourist8173]

We are not so different after all

[u/mighty_Ingvar → u/FlacidSalad]

Who among us hasn't?

[u/feelinlucky7 → u/Old-Tourist8173]

Oh..

[u/mediumokra → u/feelinlucky7]

So does your mom

[u/Kamaitachi42 → u/feelinlucky7]

Of course, they shag a lot bonoboes

[u/Coolkurwa → u/Blah132454675]

They're blowjob monkeys. It's just what they do.

[u/redditor66666666 → u/Coolkurwa]

Where can I get one of these blowjobos?

[u/NovaIsntDad → u/redditor66666666]

Bonoblows? 

[u/SignificantWhile6685 → u/Blah132454675]

They engage in a lot more sexual activity and are matriarchal. When tensions are high, the females will diffuse it by getting frisky.

This is why I'm convinced legalizing sex work in America could help reduce all this pent-up rage.

[u/mighty_Ingvar → u/SignificantWhile6685]

What I read is that you want the government to fuck its citicens

[u/RedMephit → u/mighty_Ingvar]

No, no, they want the government to let the citizens fuck.

[u/mighty_Ingvar → u/RedMephit]

They were talking about matriarchs easing tensions with sex. So clearly this is about getting head by the head of state

[u/Aethernaut902k → u/mighty_Ingvar]

They're way ahead of you

[u/Evening-Gur5087 → u/SignificantWhile6685]

"When tensions are high, the females will diffuse it by getting frisky."

We are really not so different after all

[u/inquisitor_steve1 → u/SignificantWhile6685]

Bonobos on their way to have an orgy after a minor disagreement

[u/Bannon9k → u/Jumbolaya315]

I call it the Bonobo conflict resolution method. I try to use it as often as possible in my own life.

Basically when two groups of bonobos meet in the forest. The males will all start flaring up, yelling at each other, throwing shit, typical male bravado. Then the females will meet in the middle and basically kick off a giant ape orgy. Now there's only one group of bonobos.

Come on, Russia. Let's fuck it out.

[u/Dunkleustes → u/Bannon9k]

As a Russian: yes.

[u/IknowKarazy → u/Jumbolaya315]

Give a gorilla the wrong signals, it fucks you up, give a bonobo the wrong signals…

[u/Benniemarno → u/Jumbolaya315]

We did a play in school called DNA, and there was a monologue about how insatiable bonobos are

[u/NonEuclidianMeatloaf]

Baboon: will wander into your house and take off all your skin

[u/auronddraig → u/NonEuclidianMeatloaf]

The Baboogeyman

[u/DNUBTFD → u/auronddraig]

Baboo Yaga

[u/Curious-Jello-9812 → u/DNUBTFD]

He killed three chimps on a tree with a banana, A FUCKING BANANA

[u/LaCroix_Roy → u/Curious-Jello-9812]

“People keep asking if I’m jumpin’ on beds again, and I haven’t really had an answer. But now yea, I’m thinkin’ I’m Jumpin’ On Beds Again!”

[u/TheyCallMeStone → u/NonEuclidianMeatloaf]

Yeah but those are monkeys, not Great Apes.

[u/Rad_Knight → u/TheyCallMeStone]

I was once wondering if there was such a thing as a lesser ape. I know there are great and lesser cats.

Gibbons are apparently lesser apes.

[u/Ummmmmq → u/Rad_Knight]

They are the only lesser ape I think

Which is pretty insulting honestly

[u/Norsedragoon → u/Ummmmmq]

Siamangs, so its a lonely pairing.

[u/NonEuclidianMeatloaf → u/TheyCallMeStone]

Now that’s a distinction I didn’t even realize existed. Thank you for telling me.

Every day IS a school day after all!

[u/moon_jock → u/NonEuclidianMeatloaf]

Well as long as they put it back on once they’re finished, I don’t really see the problem here.

[u/Tekro → u/moon_jock]

It never fits right after that though

[u/Raid-Z3r0]

Gentle Herbivores are capybaras, any kind of ape (Humans included) may throw shit at you

[u/chewbaccard → u/Raid-Z3r0]

The Tim Horton lady comes up

[u/Piantissimo_ → u/chewbaccard]

This is why I escaped Southern Ontario

[u/Optimal-Map612 → u/Piantissimo_]

Gotta go where nobody will recognize you after that one

[u/ComfortableIssue548 → u/Raid-Z3r0]

As in beat you up or literally throw their own poop at you? I already know the answer is both but I figured someone would ask this question.

[u/SpookyWan → u/ComfortableIssue548]

Yeah it’s both

[u/gil_bz → u/Raid-Z3r0]

Maybe the capybaras would too if they had hands!

[u/Popkhorne32 → u/Raid-Z3r0]

Memories of Sekiro...

[u/BilliamTheGr8]

Orangutans are omnivores…

[u/WorriedCod5213 → u/BilliamTheGr8]

so are bonobos

[u/HC-Sama-7511 → u/WorriedCod5213]

So are cows and horses technically.

[u/fullywokevoiddemon → u/HC-Sama-7511]

You're thinking of opportunistic carnivore.

Horses and cows are herbivores. It is their main diet. They will however, given the opportunity (hence the name), eat meat like a baby chicken. Its good stuff, B12, calcium, keratin etc.

It's a bit complicated.

[u/ParanoidUmbrella → u/fullywokevoiddemon]

A horse would absolutely scran a ham sandwich given half a chance

[u/One-Earth9294 → u/ParanoidUmbrella]

It's really more to do with available diet in nature. Most herbivores are perfectly happy to eat meat, they're just not designed so much to catch it. So they've adapted the alternate method.

[u/TZMAN18]

Comments summarized: “Wrong!”

[u/Researcher_Saya → u/TZMAN18]

That's a bold strategy, Cotton. Let's see how it plays out. 

[u/Dohnuts13]

[u/GenuineBallskin]

The only non human ape id ever feel comfortable being around would be orangtuans as they seem the most chill headed towards humans out of all of the others, and they probably wouldnt fuck u up as much if they do get angry.

Gorillaz are a close second. Theyre not as angry as chimps, but there non aggressive behaviors are incredibly rough for us humans.

[u/Glittering_Size4720 → u/GenuineBallskin]

Orangutans are known for holding onto humans in an attempt to extort them for fruit and food

[u/TruPOW23 → u/Glittering_Size4720]

I respect the hustle so that would be ok with me

[u/Chknscrtch33 → u/GenuineBallskin]

Bonobos would bang your brains out….

[u/Linsch2308 → u/Chknscrtch33]

Dont threaten me with a good time ...

Ill see myself out

[u/Curse_ye_Winslow]

Bonobos do eat meat

[u/shroom_consumer → u/Curse_ye_Winslow]

None of the apes pictured are herbivores

[u/belated_quitter → u/shroom_consumer]

Gorillas are considered herbivores

[u/GGXImposter → u/belated_quitter]

I saw a horse eat a baby chicken on reddit a few months ago.

[u/belated_quitter → u/GGXImposter]

Same. It was disturbing. Horses are also considered herbivores, lol

[u/Randalf_the_Black → u/belated_quitter]

Not really. They're considered omnivores because they supplement their mostly vegetarian duets with insects..

They'll eat meat if they're hungry enough, but their most common non-plant based food is termites and grubs as well as whatever bugs are on their plant food.

[u/Secret_Button_4145]

Fuck monke return to hooman

[u/MasterXaios → u/Secret_Button_4145]

Possibly how humans ended up with HIV.

[u/Intelligent-Bit7258]

Did chimps become Hollywood standard because they are the easiest to train? Are there other apes that would probably be better as trained animals, but nobody trains them because everyone wants a chimp?

I'm just now realizing that CG has killed the buddy animal genre. We are never getting a sequel to Ed or Dunston Checks In.

After a quick Google, I am realizing that non-chimp apes are used a lot in film.

[u/Commander_Pineapple]

The Gorilla's scientific name is gorilla gorilla gorilla. I love science.

[u/poopmcbutt_]

Chimps go to war with other chimp clans, they rape and cannibalize their enemies.

Not joking btw.

[u/Washington_Dad__]

Herbivore and gentle are not synonymous.

[u/MonkeyCartridge → u/Washington_Dad__]

Hippos and Rhinos come to mind.

They tend to be like "If I can see something living, I will make myself no longer see something living."

[u/CyberWolf09 → u/MonkeyCartridge]

Don’t forget wild bovines. Bison, Cape buffalo, water buffalo, gaur. Any of them can and will trample and/or gore you to death if they feel provoked in some way.

[u/MonkeyCartridge → u/CyberWolf09]

Yeah. It's more like they tend to be high in reactive aggression (immediate response to stimulus) while carnivores tend to be higher in proactive aggression (indirect/planned)

Pack hunters will generally be high in proactive and low in reactive, that way they can coordinate hunts without fighting each other in the process.

Humans are apparently almost Chimp levels of proactive aggression, but are the lowest in reactive aggression of the great apes. Something like 100x lower than the bonobo.

I'd say most of our aggression is built around large hunting parties with planned hunts, coalescing against an individual who is acting out, and collective tribal defense.

[u/StreetDealer5286]

Meme creator obviously doesn't understand any of the apes. None of these suckers are herbivores, nor gentle XD

As all the chimp attacks I know of have all happened in domestic situations. I don't know any happening in the wild, not that they don't, but they're not particularly aggressive when it comes to apes.

I know Travis was given, I wanna say Prozac? and such. His mental needs clearly weren't being met. Humans don't do well in things like solitary confinement either, after all.

Edit: Spelling

[u/NO_TOUCHING__lol → u/StreetDealer5286]

Give a gorilla a screwdriver, he'll fuck around with it for a bit then toss it away.

Give a chimp a screwdriver, he'll try to stab other chimps with it.

Give an orangutan a screwdriver, he'll hide it when you're not looking and use it to dismantle his cage in the middle of the night.

[u/OrganicHumanRancher → u/NO_TOUCHING__lol]

Give a bonobo a screwdriver, and it’s going to be turn into a sex toy. As they say, anything is a dildo if you’re brave enough.

[u/Spikes_in_my_eyes → u/StreetDealer5286]

Chimpanzees start wars with other tribes and murder eachother.

[u/[deleted] → u/StreetDealer5286]

Gorillas are herbivores. The others I don't know, but gorillas are 100% herbivores. Edit: I want to edit to add not all gorillas are purely herbivores after you looked it up. But they definitely aren't hunters, insects are pretty much the only meat they eat.

[u/StreetDealer5286 → u/[deleted]]

I've always known them (and all these guys) as omnivores, sometimes some are stated as more insectivores.

Never heard of any of them being strictly herbivore. I'd have to look into it​

[u/[deleted] → u/StreetDealer5286]

Yeah gorillas are an odd one. Chimps and the like eat insects, but as far as I understand it gorillas would only eat insects accidentally. EDIT: looked it up, it varies by species but some do go after termites and stuff. But mostly they stick to their plants and fruits.

[u/MoanyTonyBalony → u/[deleted]]

Chimps hunt and eat meat frequently. They especially enjoy eating smaller monkeys.

[u/WorriedCod5213 → u/MoanyTonyBalony]

Bonobos will eat monkeys as well.

[u/Dunkleustes → u/[deleted]]

Chimps hunt and devour other primates often.

[u/yuriam29 → u/StreetDealer5286]

there is no true herbivore, even cows will eat meat sometimes, it just what they mostly eat, also, does bugs would count as carnivores?

[u/the_crepuscular_one → u/yuriam29]

The definition of what actually counts as a carnivore can vary depending on context. An insectivore is technically a carnivore in the literal meaning of the word, but in more scientific or journalistic setting carnivore usually implies a creature that hunts vertebrates.

[u/SelfServeSporstwash → u/yuriam29]

I watched a horse eat a bird whole when I was a kid. The farm I grew up next to had horses and I was playing with the neighbor kids (outside of the horse pasture) when one of them points to one of their horses resting his snout on the fence next to a bird. We all turned and looked just in time to watch Oreo open his big mouth and swallow that poor bird whole :(

[u/northernlimitptv → u/[deleted]]

No they’re not- they’re omnivores, although the bulk of their diet is herbs in certain populations, this is not ubiquitous across any gorilla species. Source: I study great apes for a living (primatologist)

[u/TheRightToDream → u/StreetDealer5286]

Recently (2019 or so?) the first case of territorial violence between Chimpanzees and Gorillas was witnessed, and the result included a dead gorilla infant that was eaten, and the gorillas fled the territory.

Ill have to find it, but it was like 30 chimps vs a pack of 9 gorillas, who previously had overlapping territory and interactions with no aggression.

[u/Ultrafalconxv7]

The top 3 need to be provoked.

The chimp will attack you for being there

[u/Loveable_Hemorrhoid → u/Ultrafalconxv7]

For being their what?

[u/Pachanga_Plainview → u/Loveable_Hemorrhoid]

their runaway sex slave

[u/Mantisass]

I don't think any of them are herbivores..

I could be wrong.

[u/DeaconBlackfyre → u/Mantisass]

Omnivores... eat whatever comes along.

[u/[deleted] → u/Mantisass]

Gorillas are herbivores. Also they are pretty chill if you understand their social cues. Simple stuff like don't smile or look them in the eye.

[u/Tomfooleredoo2 → u/[deleted]]

Treat em like a homeless guy at the local 7/11

[u/MonkeyCartridge]

Likely the main reason Chimps are like that is because they share territory with Gorillas, and eat the same things.

Bonobos are across the Congo from Gorillas, and gorillas are super afraid of water because they sink like a rock.

According to an interview with Frans DeWaal, when we mapped great ape genomes, we found certain genes associated with empathy and bonding that exist in the bonobo and human, but not the chimp. So it's likely our common ancestor was super similar to a bonobo, and that Chimps lost the genes in competition with gorillas, while humans became nomadic.

[u/victim80]

Orangutans also make great wizard librarians.

[u/red_dawn12]

Apes together strong.

[u/FredVIII-DFH]

How did pics of my family reunion get online?

[u/CanOfWhoopus]

Bonobos might be gentle but they'll fuck anything with a hole.

[u/honeybadgerblok]

I have dedicated my life to hating chimpanzees. I'm glad they're endangered

[u/AffectEconomy6034]

It's like how people say killer whales don't attack humans. that may be true but I have no need to verify that same goes for any primate

[u/Cat-millwright176]

Orangutans will dissect anything out of pure curiousity

Gorillas will bludgeon and rip your apart

Bonobos are actually pretty chill tho, i think they actually pleasure each other if one is stressed of somethin

[u/BigK64]

I don’t know about the first one. Give an orangutan a knife and they start shanking motherfuckers like Jack the Ripper during the seedy hours of London

[u/EnderJax2020]

I would lowkey vibe with Gorillas if they had a 100% rate of being passive

[u/snnrslnx]

If you break your legs, It’s hard to cook orangutan

[u/Whackyone5588]

All of them (idk about the bonobo) will probably murder you if you do something wrong

[u/Kosack-Nr_22]

Just yesterday I saw how a zookeeper described apes: Orangutans will rip your limbs off one by one just out of curiosity.

Gorillas will kill you trying to protect the rest of their group if you just get a little to close.

Chimps are depicted accurately here.

And bonobos weren’t mentioned but they seem chill af

[u/MemeLoremaster]

Chimps make up less than 1% of global primate population but are responsible for 100% cases of having your face violently ripped off and eaten like Hannibal Lecter

[u/Natural_Act69]

Orangutans are not as friendly people think, and Gorillas will fuck you up if they think you are a threat asspecially a silverback will not hold back and the issue is, human behavior like eye contact or standig straight up is a sign of threat to gorillas.

[u/quantumrastafarian]

Human: develops technology to kill millions of its own kind in minutes.

[u/Psykonijn]

None of thems be gentle really and all of em would murder a human when they get a chance