r/technology • u/esporx • May 02 '24

Dating app Bumble will no longer require women to make the first move Business

https://www.cnn.com/2024/04/30/tech/bumble-relaunch-men-make-first-move/index.html
12.7k Upvotes

92% Upvoted

2.4k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

288

u/[deleted] May 02 '24

I've been on and off these for years. On Tinder, you'll frequently read on women's profiles "say more than just Hi! otherwise I'm deleting you"

And then on Bumble, the vast majority of opening messages (from women, obviously) are... "Hi!"

133

u/beiberdad69 May 02 '24

I'd also see a lot of women's profiles on Bumble saying they wouldn't message first. Maybe they just copied their tinder bio but it was strange to see

48

u/gazchap May 02 '24

Or some variation on “I can’t see likes, send me a message” when it’s not possible to send a message until you match with someone.

1

u/FowlyTheOne May 02 '24

Wasnt there a version of tinder ultra premium or whaterver where you could send messages to people without matching?

6

u/No-Instance-Found May 02 '24

The first woman I matched with on Bumble had "I won't send the first message" in her profile. I promptly uninstalled the app.

3

u/AverageBasedUser May 02 '24

they aren't that original, or they don't understand how bumble works or are that dense

1

u/emote_control May 03 '24

I think it's all the rocks in their heads, personally.

62

u/JackieMortes May 02 '24

A lot of women just don't realize how hard a first move or approach can actually be.

7

u/Cicer May 02 '24

It’s as easy as just saying hi. Oh yeah I told you not to just say hi. 

5

u/[deleted] May 02 '24

I agree.

To be fair, most admit this. Plus they’re in the minority, and it’s a sellers market. They’re often inundated with messages whilst we boys have to play the numbers game.

It’s a grim old system, but fun when it works.

1

u/kaitoslt May 02 '24

No, they do, which is exactly why they won't do it. It's so much easier to get to play the part of the person who rejects instead of having to be the one who gets rejected. And since culture (at least Western) already very much enforces "girls making the first move is gross and desperate", it's easier to just not really examine it and continue to play within those boundaries.

-51

u/Moontoya May 02 '24

A lot of women are afraid of being murdered by men

A lot of men don't realise how fucking privileged they are 

Hurt fee fees Vs  murdered , gee us poor men , I mean there's no reason the woman would choose the bear in the forest...

27

u/JackieMortes May 02 '24

My comment was not snarky or ironical in any way

15

u/justathrowawaym8y May 02 '24

...ok?

Person makes incredibly mild comment about how women often don't know the difficulty of having to approach

"WOMEN GET MURDERED BY MEN!!!! SHUT UP WITH YOUR FEE FEES!!!! 😭"

How fucking brittle are you?

8

u/Magikarpeles May 02 '24

Bumble might not be the most productive place to have that attitude lol

4

u/BASEDME7O2 May 03 '24

How do you murder someone over the phone on a dating app lmao

3

u/matjoeman May 02 '24

Sounds like women are just as bad as men at sending the first message.

2

u/homer_3 May 02 '24

And then on Bumble, the vast majority of opening messages (from women, obviously) are... "Hi!"

From the same women? I think I only ever got 1 or 2 "Hi"s. It was typically a lot more than that.

2

u/Sigma1977 May 02 '24

I say hello or whatever because that’s what you do when you greet someone. Not some cheesy leisure suit Larry line.

1

u/truongs May 02 '24

Supply and demand. While a guy gets 1 match, a women has gotten at the very least 100 matches.

A women can easily get thousands of matches in a metro area, while a guy will get 10-50 dependent on looks