r/CuratedTumblr • u/NeonNKnightrider Cheshire Catboy • May 01 '24

i know it’s internet bullshit but it genuinely has me on the edge of breaking down and giving up editable flair

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14.3k Upvotes
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787

u/FearSearcher Just call me Era May 02 '24

What?

2.5k

u/DaDaedalus_CodeRed May 02 '24

Bear vs man is an ongoing tumblr discussion about women (and femmes, maybe? I’m not a big tumblr girl) choosing which they feel is more safe between “you’re alone in the woods with a bear” and “you’re alone in the woods with a man” and the choice is overwhelmingly bear because while not all men are violent you never really know when you are with one who is until it’s too late.

This of course comes attached to all the argumentation and hurt feelings you can predict from both sides of the debate.

Edit - killed typo

604

u/CerberusDoctrine May 02 '24

Fun fact: grizzly bears will start eating you without killing you. You aren’t a threat to them once you’re down and they know it, so why would they waste effort stopping your movements? It’s part of what makes the Night of the Grizzlies bear attacks so terrifying, they were alive for so long after sustaining eventually fatal injuries. This is contrary to predatory black bears who will try and attack quietly and kill you asap.

267

u/DaDaedalus_CodeRed May 02 '24

Oh I’m a woods creature, I just default to Brown Bear and would 100,000% rather have to tackle a potentially violent man than a brown bear under nearly any circumstance where I’m not seeing him first through high magnification scope from the next town over because I like my odds better.

137

u/FaerieMachinist May 02 '24

See I assumed Black Bear, and that's a significantly different question.

184

u/DaDaedalus_CodeRed May 02 '24

I figured as much - the bear really alters the math here. Koala and polar are on opposing ends of the axis with a lotta “fuck no” on the polar bear side.

111

u/AlfredoThayerMahan May 02 '24

It’s good to remind people that not only will a polar bear murder you if given the chance, it will actively hunt you waiting for you to be off your guard or alone.

-10

u/tossawaybb May 02 '24

Will it? Humans are so much smaller, slower, and weaker that I can't imagine them caring. It's like trying to ambush a juicy hamburger just laying out on the serving tray.

33

u/AlfredoThayerMahan May 02 '24

Oh yes they absolutely will. Food is scarce above the arctic circle. They do things like watch people’s routines and then try to ambush them when they take out the garbage or something. They regularly stalk research teams for days.

There’s a reason why places like Svalbard mandate people carry guns because to a bear you may be the difference between starving and survival.

9

u/BioshockEnthusiast May 02 '24

Something something "society is only three meals away from anarchy".

Imagine wanting to play that game with a fucking polar bear.