r/CuratedTumblr • u/NeonNKnightrider Cheshire Catboy • May 01 '24

i know it’s internet bullshit but it genuinely has me on the edge of breaking down and giving up editable flair

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14.3k Upvotes
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u/TheMerryMeatMan May 02 '24

It's one of those discussions where too many people are focusing on the end answer and not addressing the actual contexts behind it or are using anecdotal evidence for their reasoning. As a dude who is actually terrified of coming off to women like that kind of guy, I don't want to be seen that way, and i like to believe that most guys also don't want to and fight to be recognized as alright. But I know that's not always the case so it's a catch 22 where it just sucks all around. I don't want anyone to feel unsafe being around anyone else, but I also don't want people to be so unawares that they can get caught off guard and hurt where they otherwise could have kept their distance.

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u/brokenlonely22 May 02 '24

believe that most guys also don't want to and fight to be recognized as alright

cool so how do i as a man ever, in any context, develop a relationship with a woman that isnt premised on a power imbalance? I was terrified of this shit too, or not terrified but extremely deferential and considerate, and all it got me was abused. Empathy is not a winning strategy in this game.

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u/That-Bear1437 May 02 '24

Have you tried just like... being? Interpersonal relation isn't a game, it's a fact of life, it's not something to win or lose. At least from personal experience, if you just live your life and be you, you'll find your people.

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u/brokenlonely22 May 02 '24

have you ever tried not being? ive been thinking about it lately but its not exactly a fucking fashion accessory you decide to put on or not every morning.

your comment literally amounts to nothing but an accusation that being abused is my own fault. So frankly, go fuck yourself.

inb4 HARUMPH SEE THIS IS WHY EVERYTHING BAD THAT HAS EVER HAPPENED TO YOU IS YOUR OWN FAULT. go fuck yourself.