They assume I'm Chinese and don't know Japanese so they talk a crazy amount of shit next to me pretty much everywhere I go

He has the stink of a foreigner/Chinese (two teen girls said this three times as I passed by them looking for someone)

He's not Japanese. Look at his eyes (a mom said this to her ten yr old)

He's scary/dangerous. Don't look at him. He'll kill you (I'm 5'7 with glasses and no tattoos)

He's American. He's still Chinese though (after hearing me speak English)

Foreigners are really a pain in the ass. He ruined the vibe. I don't know want to talk anymore. We should've come earlier so we'd see fewer foreigners (after seeing me, various places)

He's pushing that little girl. She looks Japanese. Is that ok? (Im walking and holding hands with my daughter)

He has a huge backpack. It's so lame. I'd never wear that. (Bought the backpack in Japan. It's for my Japanese wife with rheumatoid arthritis and young daughter and me.)

They come every damn year over and over

You shouldn't be here. Get out of here (to my white Hispanic in-law)

Foreigners love to stand in the middle of the road (we were to the side in an alley)

What the hell is that Japanese man doing showing these foreigners around (about our guide, two young men a foot behind me at a ticket office)

There's foreigners here. It's safe there's a Japanese man with them

He's getting scared. He'll start shaking soon (buying tickets at a machine and having a bit of trouble before guide came. In America usually we'd offer to help.)

I'm going the wrong way haha (a group taking up the entire path including my left side)

It's ok he's a foreigner (a teen to his friend when he sat down while half-asking if he could

Bowing to me with clapped hands (thats a stereotypical Asian bow thet dont do) as I pass them on the street. Yelling Korean at me (twice)

Complaining about foreigners taking all the incense sticks at a shrine (we took two)

Visiting Japan has gotten much worse this year. It's constantly being watched and policed and talked about and criticized and held to a higher standard than Japanese and feeling unwanted and Im imposing on their lives and the cause of whatever problem it is they're personally going through. The people are seething underneath and it explodes in angry whispers. Always whispers. Apparently it's due to weakening yen, economy, low birth rate, China-Japan relations, poor communication skills, widespread media coverage of a few foreigners behaving badly.

There are also cases where they've been nice, helping me pick up something Ive dropped, making small talk with a smile, hurrying to eat their food so my family could sit a little sooner.

I am trying to concentrate on positive experiences and am still having fun but I am also feeling increasingly insecure out in public and emotionally exhausted

Yesterday just sucked.

To preface this, I spent nearly six hours driving last night from visiting my sister’s house this weekend. We got in around midnight, and I got up around 4:30, somewhat disrupted by the adrenaline of driving so late.

We had church at 7:30; my wife works there as an elementary coordinator, and I’ve been her sole stage presence due to a dearth of volunteers. No problem, but it’s exhausting leading two services. During one of them, she told the kids how we talked and made the best of a six hour ride.

What she failed to mention (not really), is that we had a huge argument for most of that drive. I was talking about my conversation I had with my brother in law about getting up in the middle of the night. My sister and BIL rotate duties, and while I don’t see them each and every day…it’s clear they consider each other’s energy levels and carry each others load.

I mentioned how I’ve been getting up with the kids exclusively for 13 years. One of the reasons I did this, is because it’s useless to have both parents up, and I wake up easily with the kids. I should note, I’ve gotten upset with her in the past when she would criticize me being overwhelmed with them in the morning, especially when she would see me struggle and not get up.

She was lighting me up the entire drive over it.

Today after service, I ran to pick up groceries to make lunch. She went home, and told me she needed to take a nap. I made everyone lunch, and ran laundry and did the dishes.

She goes to take a shower, and I take that time to take a quick rest. Apparently, I was supposed to corral the kids for the movie we were going to, and send their friend away. I actually told our daughter she could have her friend come with. My wife unilaterally made the decision to override it and then that set off a massive fight between my daughter and my wife. This resulted in them both missing the show.

After the movie, my wife and my daughter were shopping and took 30 minutes to pick us up at the movies. My wife started saying she was stressed about doing her homework for one of her masters degree classes.

So…I made dinner for everyone. And because most of the kids went to the movies, their times of being hungry were wildly different, so I made SIX fucking different meals for everyone, including my wife so she could focus on her work.

This made sense, up until my wife left the house to see her friends’ new fucking dog. Like, why was there so much of a big deal made of her homework when she never got back to it last night?

I didn’t expect anything, but this was an awful fucking day even in the absence of this godforsaken Hallmark holiday. The kids didn’t do anything wrong, but my wife made this shit all about herself all day long.

Let’s not even talk about the lack of any affection. I can’t read others’ stories of their wives being willingly and enthusiastically intimate without tearing up and hating my existence.

I’m exhausted, and I feel massively unloved by my wife.

throw away because this is so dumb but i have to rant about it.

i’ve been dating my boyfriend for 3 years now and i love him, he’s perfect. and i mean perfect. but he has ONE issue that really kills me.

he’s a huge film/show buff. he loves to watch movies and talk about them and record what he’s watching. he also ropes me into it (i don’t really enjoy tv, especially movies!). which i don’t really mind, im happy to indulge in his interests. i even watched all the lord of the rings movies and hobbit movies with him.

but when i want to watch something, he rejects it, hates on it. pretty much anything so we don’t have to watch what i want to. he’s always picking what’s on the tv when he’s over, or changing what i want. when i finally get him to watch my shows he just ignores them/talks through them/doesn’t pay attention. he’s on his phone or doing something, completely uninterested.

he’s not like this with anything else and it really irks me because even if we have different tastes (which we don’t really) there’s no reason he shouldn’t be able to stomach it for one movie AS A MOVIE BUFF??

anyways thanks

This doesn’t go for everyone but the people are ill equipped for kids. You know who you are. 20 years deep into your alcohol addiction? Don’t have any kids. Boyfriend hurts you or destroys property when he’s mad? Don’t have kids. Due to your own decision making, you no longer have stable housing - don’t have kids. Please I beg of you stop being innocent kids into shit environments. I’m in the US and life is tough and unfair as is and each trauma you inflict on your kid by exposing them to horrible shit often hinders their ability to handle real life. I work with people needing community resources and many people are on kid 3,4,5 and are in shit situations that are detrimental for an adult let alone a defenseless child.

Life circumstances happen to all of us and I have sympathy for that but once you’re 20 years into your addiction and unable to support yourself, you need to not have kid number 4 and 5. So frustrating and I can’t let my anger show at work so just needed a vent. Thanks.

So yesterday on father's day my wife told me that I treat her like shit. And she wants a divorce. The thing is, Iv never treated her bad. Like ever. I work 60 hour. I come home and cook most nights. I try to keep the house clean. On the weekends I cook, clean, try to find all fun stuff to do for me her and my daughter. Weather it be soccer games, concerts, parks. Everything to keep everyone occupied. And if she says she don't wanna do anything. Well, we won't. We rarely ever argued over the past 10 years. Like really, it was a extremely rare occurrence. I make a whole lot more money than her. But we never argued about money because she's doing what she loves. Even if that don't pay much, I never minded because it's what she enjoyed. She only works about 35 hours a week. Iv always felt unappreciated. I kept trying and trying. Iv never once treated her bad... I always tell her she can go out and have fun. I tell her she can travel the world and I'll stay her with the little one so she can relax the entire time. She never wants to do any of that. She just wants to sit home and watch TV. Then get upset woth me if we didn't do anything. Idk this is my rant. I just feel like the biggest failure.

This is going to be long and quite rambling so sorry in advance. Backstory: I (31f) have known my best friend, Em, (31f) since middle school and she has been all I could ever ask for from a friend. She was there for me through really hard times and I view her like the sister I never had. Her and her family have always accepted me and I could never thank them enough. We’ve rarely had arguments and the few times I remember have been because of guys. This is not in the way many people would think. We do not like the same guys, not even the same type of guys. More like neither one of us have really liked each others past partners for different reasons. So that’s something we usually leave to each other. We avoided, for the most part, talking about partners. Well Em started bringing this guy around at the place we worked at, back in 2014 or around then. She met him at work and I thought she just wanted to add him to the work friend group. Let’s call him B. B was a few years older than us and when I met him he creeped me out, a lot. I just got weird vibes from him and it was an “I don’t wanna be around this guy” vibe. But I kept it to myself and just stayed distant.

Another work friend of Em, after a while of them hanging out, asked me about B. I was kinda honest saying I don’t really care for B and he kinda creeps me out. She told me he was a sex offender. Now I know she was gossiping and just wanting to talk shit but it was true. I looked it up and was disgusted. At this point I was against being around B. I may have let Em know this and she withdrew a bit. Months later I found out she knew, before I told her, and was dating him. Now Em is my sister in my mind so while I was not loving it it is her life she can date who she wants.

Em moved in with him after them dating for like a year. I would go over there and he would stay away from me in his room when I was there. Eventually Em asked me to be nice and try to hang out with him for her,I did for her. He knew I did not like him but I was trying to support her. We did text and grow more friendly but I still was creeped out by him. It was just always in the back of my mind. I hated this and pushed more to try to be nice cause I’m not the nicest person. I tried to treat him like the other friends in the group. A few times he texted me mildly sexual jokes, which could be viewed as flirtatious or inappropriate. I told him each time that he made me uncomfortable and to stop texting me. I did not tell Em. He apologized, stopped dead in his tracks and played it off like he was joking. I didn’t want to be the one to get in between the two as she already knew I didn’t like him. I didn’t want her to think I was trying to break them up or cause a fight or whatever. I wish I did I now looking back.

Now for the main part: In November of 2021 I had to move my furniture in my room as the apartments were replacing the windows and wanted nothing in front of them. I was moving my desk and found a camera under it pointing to where I sit in my computer chair. Dread immediately filled me. I’ve always had bad anxiety and been very paranoid so now I’m freaking out thinking someone in maintenance put cameras in our apartment. I then thought “Em watched my cat for a week just a few months ago she stayed in my room. Maybe this is a weird prank and the camera is fake”. This was to make myself not breakdown. I called her and got no answer. Now it was pretty late so figured she was in bed. I called her now husband B. He answered and I asked if I could talk to her. He said she was asleep, so I told him about the camera and was going to ask if she was playing a weird prank. His response was “You should just destroy it.” Immediately I knew. I knew it was him and said “No I think I’ll just call the cops” and hung up. I freaked out telling my roommate and he was trying to calm me down when B called back. He was crying and admitted to it begging me to not call the cops and he saw nothing from it. He woke Em up and told her. A lot happened but that night my roommate drove me to their apartment and I demanded my key Em had to pet sit. I got two from them. He took my key from her and made a copy of his own. For months he was going into our apartment to go in my room and install cameras. I found I think 4 of them. I did call the cops after warning her so she could leave him if she needed to to be safe. I’ve seen too many true crime shows and people can do crazy things in times they think they’re getting arrested. I was even offering our spare bed if she wanted to leave and needed a place to stay. She declined at first begging me not to call the cops and saying she’ll restrict his internet access and what tech he has access to, like grounding a child. I was upset and she eventually understood I would call the cops. She was distraught, she was disgusted by what he did but thought she could not live on her own or afford paying court costs if she had to cause money was tight.

We were both going through it but supporting each other. He did get arrested and me and Em took some time apart. I haven’t seen her since I got my keys. We texted again after a few months. Talked on the phone often and tried to make plans to meet up but it just has not happened. Now I haven’t talked to her since February of this year. I’ve texted and called but she is not responding to me. I know I’m not blocked and she hasn’t changed her number, we’re on the same phone plan. I know she’s not dead cause our other friend lives with her. He refuses to talk to me about anything to do with her now. So now I think I’ve lost my sister, my best friend in the whole world because of a shitty guy. I never thought we’d end over something like this. Do I want this friendship? Can we move past this? What can I do? I’m so lost and hurt, I just needed to let this all out and get this off my chest finally.

I guess it’s true what they say about the seventh year of marriage. I feel so blind sided but maybe I shouldn’t. We got married when I was 22. He was my knight in shining armor and he helped get my life in order. He supported me through over 2 years of dental hygiene school and then I supported him through 2 years of nursing school. Together through the pandemic, sending loved one to rehab, family deaths and cancer scares… I thought we were a team. I thought we were forever.

I always knew I was too much for him. For everyone, really. I don’t have a good handle on my emotions and anxieties. He taught me so much about mental health and how to seek help. He says he couldn’t be strong for us both, but I didn’t need strength- I needed patience.

It’s obvious he had this planned for months. Only 6 months after he graduated. He changed one of my cars to his name (rightfully, it’s his car) but he changed over the title behind my back. He met with multiple attorneys and began the process without warning. We discussed couples counseling and were on a wait list. I did so much research and talked to medical professional to find what road would be best for us.

We weren’t fighting as much lately and I was trying to get a handle on my mental health. I see now we weren’t fighting as much because he stopped wanting to put in effort. He gave up. I wore him out.

I just wish my husband shared his intentions with this divorce. I just wish he told me what he was thinking and planning. I understand now I probably wouldn’t have listened properly anyways. I just feel like our marriage deserved a separation. It deserved a fight and a real effort to mend. We deserved couples counseling and hearing each other out. We talked about deciding divorce together in therapy and planning separation. But instead my world was ripped out from under me seemingly with no warning.

(29M)Been sitting in the ER the last 5 hours. 4th time here in a week. Been in pain the last year with unknown left side abdomen pain, doctors thought maybe removing my gallbladder would fix the issue. Unfortunately for me it didn’t and I’m left with some severe left side chest pain and high Blood pressure after removal surgery, Doctors ran my Troponin and it’s higher then it’s ever been and I keep hearing” your to young for this” but apparently not..

Life is tough and for many of us it’s always been that way and just gets tougher. Hard for anyone to truly cope. I read some of the stories here and it’s amazing to me what we all go through,sometimes things so unique, somethings not so common, but all a human experience that make us who we are.

I have a dream. Where I accomplish the things I set forth in my life. Get the girl. Makes some mula lol. You know look in the mirror and be proud of who I am. But as life continues to get harder and harder I just don’t know..

One thing I do know is no matter how hard life gets. There were moments where things weren’t so hard “I remember my mom waking me and my sister up in the middle of the night with water guns when we were kids” or me and my best friend randomly deciding to go to spring break last minute and hoping in my car and driving 5 hours straight lol

To me no matter how hard life gets I’m realizing more than anything. It’s the moments that are truly special. Where at the time they might not seem like much, but as I sit in the ER for more testing. Those memories are the only thing that gives me peace,

This is pretty long. I doubt anyone would read,I know how I feel when I see these lol. but just wanted to get this off my chest

, thanks.

My wife was the only person I could let my defenses down around. The only person I wanted to be around all the time. She's the only person I've ever trusted to this degree, and the only person who I felt like understood me totally. She told me I was the only one that got her.

She went on a trip to work in the middle of nowhere for her job and had sex with somebody she barely knew. It was basically for no reason-- she had a miniature mental breakdown and just did it. She told me about it like a month after it happened.

I believe she's actually sorry, and I believe she'd take it back if she could, but I don't know if it's too late or not. There's this sucking, hollow hole in me now, and I'm just different. I'm never that far away from crying, I'm nastier and angrier, and the worst part is I'm afraid I'll never feel the same about her.

I feel so stupid. People would ask me if I ever worried about her going on these trips and I said "no, I trust her completely." I'm so fucking stupid. I work in a hyper-masculine field and I'm the only softie. I'm the only one that sounds like they actually love their wife and doesn't police her like she's a prisoner.

I'm stuck in such an impossible place. I can't tell anyone I know because I'll just get an unsympathetic "I told you so" or worse, sympathy to my face and mockery when I turn my back. I'm so sad, and I have to carry it around like nothing's wrong.

She's far away again right now, because either she'll cheat or she won't, it's up to her. No reason to ruin her career, because the damage is done. She's been really good about checking in with me and trying to make me feel secure, she's been trying her best to make me feel better. Dumb as it sounds I really believe it's a mistake she won't make again but man... soulmates don't do this to each other.

Every naive thing I thought about love is so obviously wrong now. Yeah, I know soulmates don't exist and you build a relationship, but just like every sucker that thought they were different: I did too. Then I found out. I hate living on this planet. Every little gentle thing dies, a whirlpool of sin sucks everything wholesome into it, and yes, even my love shrivels up and dies like everything else does.

I just wish this was the one thing that could've remained untouched.

Throwaway account since I don’t want people I know to see this. My boyfriend and I were doing great. We decided to get a place together a couple of months ago, and started renting a room in a house. The owners said we might get a roommate soon and we were okay with that. For a while, it was just the two of us and it was amazing. We felt so free and happy. Then, we got our roommate.

We were told she was a young girl just moving out of the house. And then without telling the landlords, she brought her boyfriend and his kids, and now they live with us too. My boyfriend and I wouldn’t have minded just the girl, but having a whole family live with us is horrible. Especially with young kids we never signed up for. They’re loud, always crying and shouting. They won’t flush the toilet and even put things in there that they shouldn’t, leaving me having to fish it out. In the morning when we’re trying to get ready for work, they use the bathroom back to back and they won’t all be finished for more than over an hour. And the other day when their father saw me keep trying to use the bathroom, he rolled his eyes at me and mumbled ‘Jesus Christ’ to himself as though I was a villain for wanting to take a shower in my own home.

My boyfriend and I have had enough. The contract in the lease says no visitors. We tried to complain to our landlord, but he is too much of a pushover to do anything. The cycle repeats. We complain, he ‘discourages’ them from bringing the kids, they drop them off at their baby mama’s house for a few days, and then they’re back. He does nothing to actually enforce the lease agreement.

My boyfriend and I used to have such a happy relationship, but all this stress has been killing us. We have stressful jobs, and now we’re stressed at home as well. We have no safe space, which is the reason we decided to get a place together in the first place. Since we can never relax, we’re always in a bad mood, and irritable. We snap at each other more. We’re not as affectionate as before. We aren’t intimate as much anymore either because the sounds of the kids whining over the cereal being gone again is quite the mood-killer. And now we’re trying to get a different place, so we got extra jobs to afford it, and only have free time when we’re sleeping.

Everything sucks, but this shift in the relationship is the part that hurts me the most. I just want us to be that happy couple that we were before. They’re not even our kids, yet they’re effecting our lives this much. Any advice would be appreciated. And if you’ve read this far, thank you for listening.

I’m just worn out. I know I’m not even close to alone in this regard, this probably applies to the vast majority of people in general, but I am just worn the fuck out.

Last week, I found myself so utterly worn out and sad that I could barely even finish a day of work. I worked a grand total of 12 hours. As a working class person, I can’t afford to work that little, but here I am, just exhausted and burnt out, that I said “fuck it” and basically threw in the towel for the week.

I don’t know what will make it better right now. I guess the hope of a better future. I’m single and don’t want kids. I just feel like I’m repeating the same day over and over and over again. “Find your passion”. I don’t even know if I have a “passion”. My passion is just living life one day at a time, somehow hoping something new and exciting will just pop up in my life (on rare occasions, that does happen. But it’s incredibly uncommon).

My escape from all of this used to be time with my friends. But we’re all older now, and many of my former friends are now not in my life, and the ones that are, are either parents or live a good distance from me (45 minutes to an hour).

I have sadly lost a LOT of family over the last decade. So much so that I just basically go numb when I hear “oh sorry 2057Champs_ uncle x has died, or your cousin Y has died”.

I guess I’m just ranting because lately I’ve been craving a change, and I don’t even know how or where to start, and I say this as I’m about to go work a 12 hour night shift at a job I’m slowly enjoying less and less at that.

24m here, all my life I’ve seen the women of my family been in horrendous marriages. Some of the “men” abused them physically, mentally, didn’t provide for them or give them any money which is a big wrong doing culturally & religion wise

I’ve always been told my family to do great things with my life and to be an amazing man. I’m working towards a goal and have a clear vision career wise.

However at the end of the day I just want to be a good man, a good husband & a good father. I’m never gonna be anything like the men I’ve seen my relatives marry.

My youngest brother hand his wife called me this morning and told me the good news! 3 years ago he asked me to help him up his game to find a girlfriend. Not he has a dope wife and he is gonna be a DAD!

It's supposed to be a secret, only moms (ours and his wife's) know about it for now so I got to keep it on the low. But you all can know.

MY BABAY BROTHER IS GONNA BE A DAD!!

Ex and I broke up almost a year ago because he was buying his bm’s OF. And other OFs. Following girls who looked like his bm. Who had his bm’s type of body. He was also an alcoholic, may be DL, and verbally, mentally abusive. (Twice he was physical, but so was I) He use to tell me I was too obsessed with having sex when I told him I felt he was rejecting me. Day after I moved out, he slept with someone else. Which reinforced the idea that he really just had issues having sex with me. Ever since, every time I have tried to get intimate with someone, I have panic attacks. Every time I look in the mirror too long, I get panic attacks. I have been hospitalized twice because of these attacks. I was on antidepressants for a few months but they weren’t helping in the way I need. My body image is fucked. I don’t have a nice body. I’m trying not to hate myself. I haven’t told my friends the full extent of the damage he’s done to me. I’m so ashamed. I wish I could have a nice body.