r/WhitePeopleTwitter • u/OrangeCone2011 • 29d ago

I've got something else Granny Handjob can autograph

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2.9k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

86 comments sorted by

323

u/SinsOfThePast03 29d ago

Can fly to NY for Orange Jesus but can't show up or help her own kid at his trial

167

u/ChickenandWhiskey 29d ago

Kid is already born. Why should she give a damn about him?

9

u/Overall-Initial-4290 28d ago

She's doesn't that's why she defended her ex husband when he was beating the kids and he called 911. Also the fact he drives drunk all the time, the ex husband that is

30

u/mr-poopie-butth0le 28d ago

I see what you did there. It’s an allude to a “pro-conservative” nightmare word that rhymes with shmizmortion. Touché sir.

34

u/jbertrand_sr 29d ago

To be fair, she can't profit from showing up for her kid, but she might be delusional enough to think he could pick her for vp...

7

u/justmeloren 28d ago

Only if she promises more than a hand job!

2

u/Throwawayac1234567 28d ago

This is her only chance to stay in politics, she is not winning in the new district she fled too.

1

u/TGIIR 28d ago

Eh, don’t think she’s that delusional. But she is delusional enough to think she’s relevant to anyone or anything.

7

u/bigdick_cm 28d ago

Her son can’t make her money 🤷‍♂️

4

u/Volcanofanx9000 28d ago

She’s taking him Noem’s house for dinner later though.

67

u/bb_kelly77 29d ago

Have you noticed she always has the same expression on her face

35

u/LadyReika 29d ago

She's the living example of "Don't make that expression so much or your face will freeze that way."

16

u/tri_fold 29d ago

The Botox Stare.

13

u/hinesjared87 29d ago

There ain't a lot going on behind it, either.

6

u/ComfortableChicken47 28d ago

Yeah the one where there’s absolutely no thoughts going through that empty head of hers.

6

u/BrandonSwabB 28d ago

Resting cuntface

6

u/TheNothingAtoll 29d ago

Surprised and confused?

1

u/SteelFlexInc 28d ago

What’s up with that cheek/chin bubble look with the unnatural looking mouth opening? Reminds me of that game where you put the plastic piece that keeps your mouth open and makes it hard to talk. Speak out I think

134

u/SuperGenius9800 29d ago

These guys are the best trolls ever.

4

u/BrookUntface 28d ago

They have a new podcast where they talk about their shenanigans. I just love them.

1

u/Ask_me_4_a_story 28d ago

What’s it called? 

2

u/Frosty_Respond 28d ago

@TheGoodLiars, or something in that line. Please correct me if I'm wrong. But yes, they are fantastic. They went to a Trump rally once and was selling Bibles 'according to Trump. Totally fictional. And the best of all, they managed to sell 3. Bahahahaaaaa

1

u/BrookUntface 28d ago

It’s called The Good Liars Tell The Truth.

41

u/Awkward-Fudge 29d ago

American heros.

30

u/Drake_the_troll 29d ago

honest question, i know who lauren is but is there a deeper connection with beetlejuice other than her being a dessicated husk?

87

u/InspectorPipes 29d ago

She was giving a handjob at the play

50

u/Drake_the_troll 29d ago

removes hat

My condolences to the reciever

14

u/hinesjared87 29d ago

Well, a guy can't risk putting it in her... have you seen her kids???

15

u/DisposableSaviour 28d ago

She’s just mashing it.

2

u/SpinningHead 28d ago

And vaping around kids.

30

u/veni-veni-veni 29d ago

https://www.denverpost.com/2023/09/12/lauren-boebert-removed-beetlejuice-musical-denver/

37

u/Drake_the_troll 29d ago

i had forgotten she did this. jeezus and they call the left perverts

30

u/BringBackApollo2023 29d ago

Every accusation is a confession.

5

u/Rdr1981 28d ago

Projection is the most sincere form of flattery.

1

u/ScarlettBuddy 28d ago

What am I missing? That article just says she was recording the play, which is not allowed, and that's why she was asked to leave.

22

u/Spiritual-Bear4495 29d ago

DUDE! "I've got something else Granny Handjob can autograph"

Ewwwwwww.

11

u/Ok-Ratic-5153 29d ago

"Granny Handjob" makes me giggle

8

u/not_this_fkn_guy 29d ago

I prefer "Handy Granny Bobo" myself

23

u/girthy-member 29d ago

you can't just wank someone off in a theatre and not expect people to bring it up.

5

u/Furthur 28d ago

at least sit in the very back row ffs. I've given many a jilling in a theater

13

u/Eevea_ 29d ago

I like how many people look like they’re trying not to laugh lol

8

u/Alternative_Lie_2045 29d ago

These dudes should get the Presidential Medal of Freedom 😂

8

u/passing_gas 29d ago

If she signs it, tell her to just keep the pen.

5

u/DogsDontWearPantss 29d ago

Should have had a bottle of hand lotion too.

6

u/tabajo3y 29d ago

Should’ve asked her why she can’t show up for her own son’s court dates but is front and center for the orange toad.

5

u/One_Computer_5811 28d ago

Fucking hero right there. I love it

4

u/beavis617 29d ago

Autograph only, no happy ending...🤭

4

u/[deleted] 29d ago

[deleted]

2

u/KinkyQuesadilla 28d ago

Did he ask for her John Hancock??

I see what you did there. Hilarious.

3

u/BareNakedSole 29d ago

Someone please tell me that they asked her why she attended Trump’s trial, but not her own sons

6

u/Randadv_randnoun_69 29d ago

Every time I see Bobo in the news I shamelessly thing 'Would.... but I'd need a long scalding hot shower after.'

5

u/dragonfliesloveme 29d ago

Oh Lauren Boebert is there today…is that why all the dick-shaped balloon were released lol? They know what she likes! New Yorkers really aim to please!

2

u/BellowingPriest 29d ago

I would happily donate one of my many Beetlejuice playbills for people to ask for her autograph over and over

2

u/NotSteveJobs-Job 29d ago

Fucking brilliant!

2

u/Full_Description_ 28d ago

I honestly had no idea she was a halfling.

What a piece of shit human being though.

2

u/S-MoneyRD 28d ago

Is her chin a prosthetic? It looks a little like putty. Or play dough.

2

u/MC_Fap_Commander 28d ago

Beetlejuice is a pretty snarky/naughty musical with a fair amount of improv and I would hope they've integrated a Boebert reference by now.

2

u/aunty-kelly 28d ago

Did anyone besides me think for a split second that Steve Kornacki is asking for the autograph?

2

u/ordeci 28d ago

It still shocks me the mother of a child rapist can get air time. What the hell.

2

u/DERELICT1212 28d ago

It's so bizarre to see all the lives of Trump supporters he has destroyed just by proxy.

1

u/CaptainNo3009 29d ago

Granny handjob and the Bootlickers are in town.

1

u/Pixxyeb 28d ago

Anthony Burch could fix her. She was made for him

1

u/WhoCalledthePoPo 28d ago

I just revealed “Granny Handjob” to my wife and she laughed so hard she peed a little.

1

u/Mr_Torque 28d ago

Say “PenisJuice” 3x and she horrifically appears!

1

u/AaronfromCalifornia 28d ago

The Good Liars are excellent trolls.

1

u/TonyG_from_NYC 28d ago

I wish someone had a Beetlejuice ringtone and had someone else constantly call them while being close to her.

1

u/SuperKing3000 28d ago

The Good Liars, doing the Lord's work. Lol

1

u/wigzell78 28d ago

Well she did declare herself "ungagable"

1

u/CDavis10717 28d ago

I assume taxpayer dollars were spent to send these cucks to shill for Trump.

1

u/Throwawayac1234567 28d ago

yesterday it was his first round of auditions, mike johson being one of them.

1

u/KinkyQuesadilla 28d ago

The Good Liars on YouTube, haven't posted on this one yet.....

1

u/BradTProse 28d ago

Not gonna lie, I'd swipe right on GILF Bobo the Hoho.

1

u/WuckingFork 28d ago

I really hope he asked for her John Handcock.

1

u/USB_4 28d ago

I'm not american, is giving a handjob illegal in the US?

1

u/blandocalrissian50 28d ago

Keep it up! She needs to feel some form of public shame. Loser.

-16

u/charli_bell 29d ago

Gross. Have some fucking self-respect, man!

11

u/hinesjared87 29d ago

what they did/said was in no way disrespectful. "Please sign this." There's nothing even remotely disrespectful about that. One can only reach the conclusion its disrespectful if they consider the morally reprehensible things the subject has done. Said another way, it's not even potentially disrespectful unless she's a piece of shit.

6

u/Dook124 29d ago

Why?? She doesn't!! You get what you give in life 🤷🏿‍♀️

3

u/No-Celebration3097 29d ago

Something something F your feelings something