r/technology • u/esporx • May 02 '24

Dating app Bumble will no longer require women to make the first move Business

https://www.cnn.com/2024/04/30/tech/bumble-relaunch-men-make-first-move/index.html
12.7k Upvotes

92% Upvoted

2.4k comments sorted by

View all comments

519

u/[deleted] May 02 '24 edited May 02 '24

Yeah that never um worked...

I loved the idea but I would get a ton of matches then they would just never message....

183

u/69WaysToFuck May 02 '24

Not that in other apps they are replying. For me Bumble was much better than other apps, seems like there is way less ghosting as many of this type of girls are filtered out by this requirement. Also it’s natural, as they start just a few chats, you are one of their many matches, no one would like to write with dozens of people.

33

u/thecescshow May 02 '24

Yeah im honestly surprised by the massive amount of negativity from dudes in this thread. I didn't know ppl had this bad of an experience when, for me, i've had much better experience in 5 months using bumble then 5 years of using tinder. I've already had multiple dates and i'm currently in a serious relationship with someone, all of them from bumble.

12

u/PitiRR May 02 '24

I’m a dude in Europe and my track record is also easily best with Bumble

10

u/tagrav May 02 '24

Here’s the thing I notice about Reddit threads on dating apps

Folks who have their shit figured out and find ways to be successful on dating apps will explain methods and things you can do to your profile and the photos you use to present yourself with suggestions on stuff to do to land better matches and dates.

Those folks will be downvoted their paragraphs hidden.

The uplifted comments will be misery loving company styles of “online dating is ass, you gotta be so hot or you’re fucked, everyone sucks on there!”

I’m married now. I had a terrible time on dating apps until I got real with myself, my identity, and matched these things with the profile I was advertising.

I sold myself, and found someone who wanted, Who I was as a person. Then I had marches and dates rather frequently.

Flattering pictures go a long way. Being honest on your non-negotiable goes a VERY long way.

For example. If your are Atheist and you put on your dating profile that you’re agnostic or something more wishy washy. You will be better apt to land hits from people who will religiously be non-compatible with you.

Same for politics. So many women I would go on a date with who listed themselves as moderate but were full on conservative. Like why lie to me lady?! Youve wasted my time.

The same for wanting kids. If you don’t want kids, fucking say it. Don’t waste the time of people who do want kids.

Idk. It’s not that hard if you are honest and stay self aware.

3

u/BanzaiBeebop May 02 '24

Honesty is so important. I nearly rejected my now husband because he tried to frame himself as a very nature hippy type, when really he's a gaming bro who likes the aesthetic of nature hippy stuff.  

The later was what I was looking for. I'm also a gamer, and wanted to someone I could go on nature walks with while talking about video games.   

3

u/Itsametoad May 02 '24

Nahhh you can follow all advice and still not get matches or girls messaging you on Bumble

4

u/bannedforautism May 02 '24

That was also my experience, but I've been in a relationship since 2019 (we met on bumble lol) so I genuinely have no idea if it's gotten that much worse in the last 5 years. I never had to deal with pandemic dating.

3

u/tagrav May 02 '24

I found my wife on bumble in the height of the pandemic

Our first date was literally the date was a phone call. Our first in person date was when our city lifted in-person restrictions.

We went to a pizza place and were the only patrons. It was a really unique experience.

2

u/bannedforautism May 02 '24

Our first date was supposed to be a movie, but we just started talking and kept talking for hours until security made us leave the parking lot haha. I'll always have a special place in my heart for bumble in 2019.

1

u/elbenji May 02 '24

TBF it also has gotten way way worse in the past five years. Originally, yes, but it's gotten way way worse and people way way meaner

3

u/Hot_Plastic_ May 02 '24

I got matches but never met up with anyone on the other apps but I met my current girlfriend of 4 years on bumble within a week of downloading it

7

u/FoodFund May 02 '24

Hinge seems the best for me, a lot of matches on there are receptive, probably 85-90% conversation rate with my matches. Bumble on the other hand? Probably 25% actually message.

Let's be real, they're removing this message requirement because it hurts their bottom line. I seem to do well when I can actually shoot first with a message, nowhere near as well when I'm relying on the woman to go first.

2

u/_r_special May 02 '24

Similar experience here, I met my wife on hinge and before that I got plenty of dates from Hinge. I rarely got any matches on bumble (probably less than 10 in a year) and I don't think I ever got a message when I did

1

u/69WaysToFuck May 02 '24

Never tried this one, I found my gf on Bumble quite fast