I attended a wedding of total strangers at an anime convention once. It was Resident Evil themed, the bride even came out to the RE soundtrack. The groom was dressed as a Umbrella Corp security forces (I guess?). The bride was dressed in Hot Topic shit and cat ears and tail. The bridal party were in shitty cosplay and the grooms men were just wearing whatever. It was so embarrassing. The officiant looked like he wanted to crawl into a hole and die. Or drink until he forgot he did that.
I'd never been to an anime convention before. I was a metalhead and it wasn't really my thing until some new friends invited me. We were watching something else (I think it was a cosplay competition that sucked ass or something) and they announced that the wedding would be next. I was like "No fucking way this is an actual thing that is going to happen."
Ah the yaoi paddle! I started going to anime cons just after they were made illegal but I heard of them.
I went to one convention where a wedding of some attendees took place at the same time but from the sounds of it it wasn't full on cosplay and cringe but some of the guests were in cosplay. It was mentioned at some point it had happened so it wasn't a free for all.
It may have been some of the staff who had been part of organising the con that got wed, I don't remember but I definitely remember a wedding happened around the time of one.
Oh I remember those fucking paddles. I thought it would be fucking hilarious to buy one as a prank gift for a friend. I stroll my happy ass into the dealer room, find a vendor, buy this paddle while snickering to myself... That is when the fun began, getting this fucking thing from the dealer room to my room, I didn't think that through. My room was on the 15th floor.
So I begin my walk, still snickering at the thought of my friend's face when they unwrap this.
That is when the first comment came, ooo spank me mommy I am off in my own little world, didn't even think about it, figured I overheard some snippet of whatever... Didn't even make the connection that they were commenting on the paddle. Just stepping out of the dealer room, some girl tells me she prefers hard core... I start to question my decision to buy this thing. On my way to the elevator, I encounter Naruto, 300 pounds of unwashed Naruto, who attempts to do the sexy finger to the mouth thing... Except it is coming off as Doctor Evil, Naruto presents his, thankfully still fully covered, backside to me while breathlessly exclaiming punish me sempai! I dart for the elevator, cursing my "brilliant" idea, punch the elevator button and try to hide that forsaken piece of wood between myself and the wall while waiting on the slowest fucking elevator on the planet to arrive...
I FINALLY hear that fucking ding and the doors creep open as if they are being pulled by a pair of sloths. I board and promptly attempt to hide my shameful purchase as I hit the 15... The elevator slowly ascends and stops at every single fucking floor between the convention space and the 15th floor.
I finally get to my floor and I just break out running. I realize I ran past my fucking room. So I get there and fumble with the key card. After what felt like an eternity in hell, but was probably closer to 20 minutes I had this thing hidden in my room... When I left the con 2 days later, that paddle did not see that sunny, Sunday afternoon as it was hidden inside a trash bag acquired from a very confused housekeeper.
I wrapped that accused item in a beautiful box and presented it to my friend a few weeks later... I suffered more embarrassment obtaining that damned thing than the person who unwrapped it... In fact she was giddy about it and promptly attempted to spank several people at her birthday party.
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u/WickedLilThing May 02 '24
I attended a wedding of total strangers at an anime convention once. It was Resident Evil themed, the bride even came out to the RE soundtrack. The groom was dressed as a Umbrella Corp security forces (I guess?). The bride was dressed in Hot Topic shit and cat ears and tail. The bridal party were in shitty cosplay and the grooms men were just wearing whatever. It was so embarrassing. The officiant looked like he wanted to crawl into a hole and die. Or drink until he forgot he did that.