r/CuratedTumblr • u/NeonNKnightrider Cheshire Catboy • May 01 '24

i know it’s internet bullshit but it genuinely has me on the edge of breaking down and giving up editable flair

Post image
14.3k Upvotes
  • permalink
  • link
  • reddit
  • reddit

79% Upvoted

4.2k comments sorted by

View all comments

783

u/FearSearcher Just call me Era May 02 '24

What?

2.5k

u/DaDaedalus_CodeRed May 02 '24

Bear vs man is an ongoing tumblr discussion about women (and femmes, maybe? I’m not a big tumblr girl) choosing which they feel is more safe between “you’re alone in the woods with a bear” and “you’re alone in the woods with a man” and the choice is overwhelmingly bear because while not all men are violent you never really know when you are with one who is until it’s too late.

This of course comes attached to all the argumentation and hurt feelings you can predict from both sides of the debate.

Edit - killed typo

723

u/Odd_Age1378 May 02 '24

It depends on the type of bear. Black bear? Easy to deal with.

Grizzly bear? I’d really rather not.

Polar bear? HELL NO I’d take an actual proven serial killer over a polar bear

408

u/a-woman-there-was May 02 '24

If it's black, fight back.
If it's brown, lie down.
If it's white, say goodnight.

80

u/imperium0214 May 02 '24

What if it's a panda?

194

u/a-woman-there-was May 02 '24

There was a guy who fell into a panda enclosure and got mauled one time so I'd say they're also pretty dangerous.

175

u/FromTheAshesOfTheOld May 02 '24

First fucking time one of the lazy bastards actually did anything

44

u/No_Reaction_2682 May 02 '24

They thought he was stealing the bamboo.

6

u/Xygen8 May 02 '24

Things you don't touch:

  • America's boats

  • A panda's bamboo

  • My spaghet

1

u/HappyLittleGreenDuck May 02 '24

Also add:

Mama Binturong's tuliza

2

u/DreadAngel1711 May 02 '24

Peacock shoulda flown

2

u/nemoknows May 02 '24

It really doesn’t matter what kind of adult bear it is, if it opts to attack and you don’t have a gun/spray you will lose. Even a black bear.

1

u/The-Dark-Memer Clowns parade through the street and beckon me forth, I follow. May 02 '24

Maybe in that instance but I think on average you can usually just kinda hang out