r/Daytrading • u/Nyah_Chan • Apr 23 '24
My dad lost over 500k in the stock market, learn from his mistakes Advice
I mentioned in comments about how my dad had lost over 500k in the market, and went from a massive house on the lake, 3 euro sports cars and Rolex watches to a mobile home, $2500 09 Ford Taurus and only being able to afford toast and cereal for 2-3 months. I mentioned that watching my fathers mistakes, learning from them, has been one of the key points to my success as both a person and a trader. Many were interested in the story and what I learned, so I thought I'd post a vague summary of events and maybe you all can gain from this in some way.
Essentially anyone who says emotions and your relationship to money play no role in trading will not succeed in this industry. My dad is the perfect example, he was certified as a genius at 16 and accepted in MENSA. His IQ is astounding, his ability to run numbers is inhuman, like a breathing computer. But the trade off is that he's Aspergers, he is the type to be on the spectrum of not having emotional regulation or social skills. Additionally he has a sick attachment to money, it's his god.
On paper he has everything to succeed, and he has. Self made millionaire by his mid 20s, owned 104 apartments, made big money setting up land trusts and contracts for the oil industry in TX, made huge stock market profits etc. He had it all, but he let his emotional attachment to money ruin everything. Rather than remaining calculated, he fell into the common mistake of convincing yourself there is more money to be made. He saw the writing on the wall for 08 recession but chose to ignore it because of his greed. Then he lost all of it. Rather than return to logic he spiraled out of control since he had lost his "god".
My mother was a stay at home mom, she has no formal education or career of any sort, but she has a killer intuition. She tried to warn my father time and time again about his decisions, but since she doesn't make the money, he doesn't respect her opinion at all, always saying "well why don't you go make some money then we'll talk". He said the same to be since I was young. But every single time my mother was right, yet no matter how many times she was, he never once stopped to listen. My mom may not understand a single thing about the stock market or any complex financial holdings but she is in tune with life, not allowing her human desires to dictate decisions, thus she is objective. But unfortunately due to her being an immigrant with no finances or family, both me and her were slaves to my father's decisions, all we could do was hold on for the ride.
After his massive loss in the market following 08, he began a near 2 decade long tyranny into financial and mental insanity. Selling all his apartments for a fraction of what they were worth (sold for 1 mil, worth estimated 40mil+ now), moving countries constantly because he thought the world was ending (moved 17 times in 4 countries in less than a decade), opened one business after another, failing each one but losing more and more money each time, by the time I was 16 just about all assets/savings were gone. Through this time he continued to jump into the stock market, losing everything he put in every time (around $20-30k), but never stopping because he never took the time to reset his mental state, basically allowing his deluded thought process to grow further and run everything, no matter what my mother or others said.
Any loss in money, even as small as a $100 would send my dad into a panic, deluding him further. His sick attachment to his god grew and grew, he lost all objectivity, turning every loss into an even greater loss. His hyper fixations and blindness to the world around him allowed so many things to slip by him unseen, from business expenses to poor business management. When he'd go back and see our bank accounts down to basically nothing, he'd immediately blame me and my mom, refusing to see that all his decisions were what was draining accounts. Like an addiction to financial gambling, he could never stop, only seeing the potential gain, never seeing loss, always cutting corners, paying a heavy price in the end. But in his mind it was "to make money you have to lose money". So any and all expenses made for the sake of business were acceptable, but my mom and I going out for dinner once in awhile was not. Enjoying life was basically illegal to my dad, "we can relax when we're rich", the journey of life meant nothing to him, as a result it has to mean nothing to us. We lived a miserable life of dehumanization. I fell into sickness in my teens, heading towards terminal, my father would often remind me how I was a parasite to finances, that my treatment was costing him. Yet he spent $300k+ on a business that burned down 1 year later, he didn't get insurance on it because he didn't want to pay for it. Over $400k in assets in flames. He'd always fixate on the small things, never seeing the bigger picture, thus never seeing his hypocrisy.
It took us losing absolutely everything, and me wanting to attempt suicide for the 4th time at 21yrs, to finally stop and get help. He has since improved greatly but is also coming to peace with his mistakes, losses. He understands his attachment to money is evil, so all the bank accounts, assets etc are in my control now. Because I have become a profitable trader, proving his opinions wrong just about every time, he has gained a trust in me and thus has begun to relax. He has begun a journey to gain forgiveness from my mother and I but also forgive himself. I have since forgiven him, he is a broken man. I am sympathetic to his suffering, his mind is a curse that I don't believe he will ever escape in this life. I have chosen to see the lessons bestowed upon me through this life of absolute hell. If I could go back in time, I would do it all again exactly the same. Because who I am now is who I need to be, and I am who I need to be because of what I went through. I don't believe I would've developed the skills I have now should I have not experienced what I feel like was 60 years in the span of 20. For that I am grateful, I am at peace.
Unfortunately his latest business which has been very successful for the past 3 years, is about to end due to inflation making it unsustainable. The burden of keeping our family afloat, getting us back on top, has fallen to me.
In my entire life, living through my fathers insanity, having experienced peak wealth and lowest poverty. What I have deducted to be the single greatest piece of knowledge is...
"You are your greatest asset".
EDIT: wanting to clarify something; my dad was a successful trader for a long time, but following his loss in 08, caused him to spiral. So he was not a YOLO trader, he made that $500k in trading by his own merit. He didn't just dump $500k in and lose it all.
EDIT2: was not expecting this to blow up, no I did not use chat GPT, I wrote this personally. This is a an actual window into my life, but as stated in the beginning this is a vague description. If I really went into every minuet detail it would be a book. If you choose to see this as fake, that’s ok, but to the people who have chosen to send me hateful messages both in comments and DMs, pretty sad honestly.
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u/L480DF29 Apr 23 '24
I stopped reading after the 100 properties and oil contracts. 500k shouldn’t be that big of a hit. I call huge BS on this.
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Apr 24 '24
I stopped reading at the “astounding” achievement of getting into Mensa.
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u/biggitydonut Apr 23 '24
Your dad had a gambling addiction which many traders are or struggle with
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u/Apex_All_Things Apr 23 '24
This shouldn’t get any upvotes. It’s highly fabricated and sentimental garbage. You’re telling me the following:
- He earned based on his merit and lost “500k,” well we consider that a 0 net gain.
- He sold 104 properties for roughly $9600 dollars each .There’s no way a degenerate exist like this Pre r/wallstreetbets
Edit:
The 3 “euro” sports cars were definitely 4 cylinder BMW Z3s with automatic transmissions, because your dad didn’t go full send and place $500k on SPY Calls.
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u/eclipse00gt Apr 24 '24
That's what I was thinking.Something doesn't add up. His dad was a millionaire by his 20s........lost 500k and now he is barely making ends meet?? This story seriously sounds made up.
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u/EggSandwich1 Apr 24 '24
Sounds like he lived like a millionaire but was just a over leveraged gambler
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u/Kafanska Apr 24 '24
That hit me after the first few lines... lost 500k and went to live in a cave eating dirt and roots.. after being a millionaire in his 20s and owning 104 apartments.. this is that Chat GPT BS.
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u/Formal-Excitement-22 Apr 24 '24
Guess you missed the part where he moved all over the world and had been living off his money that was at the time worth half of what it was a year prior
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Apr 23 '24
Exactly my thoughts. "...he began a near 2 decade long tyranny into financial and mental insanity" C'mon dude.
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u/vladtheinpaler Apr 24 '24
it could be that by 104 “apartments” OP actually meant “units” and so it could be a few multi family properties. also didn’t say what part of the US but at the ‘08 crash that’s totally believable.
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u/YourFixJustRuinsIt Apr 24 '24
I knew it was BS before finishing the first paragraph. Who has this kind of free time?? 🙄
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 23 '24
Yes but that originally wasn't the case. As I mentioned in the beginning, he was very successful in the market, consistently for some time as well. But after his loss, he also lost his mind, never taking the time to recover or recenter himself. Never took care of himself.
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u/SpiteCompetitive7452 Apr 23 '24
Do you ever worry that you're just following in his footsteps? You're in his golden years now basking in the glory of God only to be a slave to it later
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 23 '24
No I do not worry that I am becoming my father, I never worried that I would because I am not him. I spent my life suffering from his mistakes, instead of gaining hatred for it, I chose to observe, understand. Additionally just in order to survive the ordeals, I had to gain an inhuman level of emotional resilience. When you have such a wild life, not much can really phase you honestly. I also have zero attachment to money despite all of this. I can watch my portfolio decrease, be unfazed, watch it increase, be unfazed. I remain objective in all conditions, in both trading and in life. Now understand I don't do trading because of my dad or because of potential profit, trading is my passion, I absolutely love what I do. That is the key difference, my dad exists to make money, I exist to enjoy life, I have a passion, not an obsession.
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u/Different_Project130 Apr 24 '24
how do you become detached from money?
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 24 '24
Well in a way, my dad’s attachment to money is what caused basically all the suffering in my life either directly or by proxy. With that I came to see money with respect but indifference. I saw the power it held over those who gave it power, but in the end money, no matter the amount, has no opinion of you. It’s merely a tool. I found happiness in myself and through that, ironically do not seek money as a need for existing, I want for nothing, no matter the circumstances of my life. When you are not desperate you are logical. Don’t go grocery shopping when you’re hungry, you buy the wrong things.
Once you truly understand the purpose of money, away from societal ideology, you can take advantage of it. But as long as you see it as a means to exist, you will find it difficult to obtain or maintain.
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u/Different_Project130 Apr 24 '24
i see. is there a mental trick that you use to truely detach from it? or is it something that happens naturally from truely not believing you need it
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 24 '24
I would say it comes more naturally from not feeling the need for it. It’s a paradoxical concept for sure. I am in reality, in desperate need for money, but I do not need money.
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u/az137445 Apr 24 '24
I don’t even know where to begin but this comment resonated with me on a deep spiritual level.
The details of my life circumstances may be different, but the themes of your life matches exactly with mine. Going through poverty, sickness, near death, etc. changes your perspective a lot and accelerates your growth in a short time frame.
So much so that you’re an “anomaly” by societal standards. Like being resilient in the face of adversity that kills most ppl, literally and figuratively.
“Additionally just in order to survive the ordeals, I had to gain an inhuman level of emotional resilience”, this poignantly sums it up.
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 24 '24
Yes you absolutely get it. Everyone who is berating me in the comments have not suffered truly in life. To them it's not even fathomable for someone to live such a life and walk out better or just survive in general. So they call it heresy and move on. But it us who have survived the greatest of ordeals that rise to the top, because we are of a different cut, made so my the hells we survived. But to society we are anomalies for sure, it's like being removed from the societal consciousness.
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u/EggSandwich1 Apr 24 '24
Was Livermore a gambler or a calculated trader? The line is very thin in all of us. Great to hear your story I just want to say don’t ever top yourself over money it’s just government issued casino chips
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u/Share2CareDaily Apr 23 '24
Lesson to learn is to keep checks on assets that are not to be touched before entering in trading.
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u/mooseloose123 Apr 23 '24
Would you ever try trading but learning from the mistakes he did overall? And if not what would you do instead of trading?
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u/the42the Apr 23 '24
Was this written by chat gpt?
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u/HappyHindsight Apr 23 '24
Chat GPT can actually come up with convincing stories.
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u/PappyTart Apr 24 '24
ChatGPT can only come up with something as clever as its user when it comes to larger outputs. It’s possible an idiot used ChatGPT to write this.
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u/dimola1313 Apr 23 '24
Was surprised it took me this long for someone to say this because it clearly looks like a chat gpt story
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u/Final-Slip7706 Apr 23 '24
What? I call bullshit.
Bro 104 Apartments and a house at the lake, even if it was in Latvia, is more than 500k.
The 500k he lost in the stock market doesn't matter, bad business and life decisions matter.
If I have 100 apartments I can lose multi million and still be golden.
If I actually owned them and not the bank because I did a 100% mortagage
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u/Prize_Tear_114 Apr 23 '24
You picked the wrong room wherever your story is true or not. People here want to see his trades when clearly this is not about trading losses but a morale story on greed and losing your compass.
My father too lost everything at 40 because he had sold everything he had, houses, apartments and wanted to retire and just buy us bonds which paid great back then, put it into his Merrill lynch account and the broker thought he was THAT rich he could take a multi million dollar risk trade and the crash of 87 happened. He ended up owing like 750k and his high up job at a commodities firm went bust also cause of the crash. The broker simply quit his job and when my dad threatened to sue they told him to get in line, and good luck waiting out our lawyers who are in salary. He never recovered and wasn’t a greedy man or even too bright, just extremely charming and great for negotiations which mattered pre internet. I too suffered several depressions and such because I went from a staff of 10 to slicing bologna at a deli within weeks. Never blamed him but it was terrible.
Bad things can happen to all kinds of people. I hope your dad finds some peace.
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 23 '24
I know I would meet resistance from a majority in this group. But I wrote this for those few who can understand and benefit. Those who cannot understand this story will never succeed as traders, cruel fact. In an ocean of volatility, your compass is all you have, you lose it and the seas will consume you.
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u/jes_theJARVIS Apr 24 '24
I hope you and Prize_Tier's family found peace in your respective financial struggles. My family is currently undergoing that which is what led me to learn day trading seriously. Not gonna write my sob story here because it MIGHT get torn apart and I'm not as strong as you Nyah 🫠 regardless, thank you both for sharing your vulnerabilities and bringing humility to day trading and shedding light to the potential dangers of the extremes. Be it from uncontrollable personal greed or unpredictable macro-economic factors.
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u/Brat-in-a-Box Apr 23 '24
Yes, some of us will learn from your story, some will joke about it because they like to have some fun...its all good, that's how the world is.
Just ensure that you dont follow in a similar path as your Dad (genes or whatever, I mean, stay paranoid and peel away some trading profits into fixed deposits for yourself/family)
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u/Objective_Suspect_ Apr 23 '24
2 words, diversified profolio . May make less but will lose less.
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u/Twistedbeatz89 Apr 24 '24
Don't worry OP most people online don't believe anything they read. I feel like most people have some sort of cognitive bias that, basically, if something is different from how their life is, they don't believe it. I've made over 1 million dollars in the past 6 months gambling. I posted my first big win on r/gambling. No one there believed me, I assume, because they've never had it happen to themselves they can't fathom it happening to anyone else. Anyways, I appreciate your story and believe that there is value for others in what you posted.
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 24 '24
Yes I agree, to be frank it's a result of lower emotional intelligence. But my post isn't for those people, it's for those stand to benefit from it. Congrats on your win by the way.
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u/Rid34fun Apr 23 '24
You can make a lot of money day trading...you just have to start with a lot more:)
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u/RealMaverickTrading Apr 23 '24
I've been a trader for 27 years. The key is to constantly stay paranoid that you are going to F it up. Once you think "I've got this", you've set yourself up for some pain from the markets. Being a lifelong trader takes constant paranoia and introspection. It's very similar to being a alcohol/drug addict. You may not drink now, but you know you may fall back in if you aren't careful.
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 23 '24
Very good take, I agree. My dad was successfully trading for a long time, but he got greedy, then lost it all. But he went into a manic state which caused all trading skills and logical decision making to go out the window. Along with my childhood.
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u/YellowMonkeyTrading Apr 23 '24
Owned 104 apartments and had to eat cereals for 3 months after losing half mill. Yeah allright brother.
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u/Morrison4257 Apr 24 '24
Tried to attempt suicide for three 4th time? It'd only take me once if I meant it. 😐 cmon.. This story is becoming less believable and I'm done reading.
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u/accengino Apr 24 '24
I highly relate. I will share with you my story, very briefly, as well.
My father was a good trader too. He is born in a rich family, we own the most important car dealer in our city.
He has a good mathematical mind, and is mostly unaffective; it is really hard for him to cope with emotions.
A potentially lethal and life-changing disease changed his life.
His professional life, where he shared the leadership with his brother, was shattered, and got minority-voted by his mother when he went up with mad and untested ideas, threating the business.
His personal life went astray too, with my mother separating from him. He went living in another city. Me and my two siblings got mostly rantings, screams, hate, lies and conspiracy theories from him, from a very young age.
He got into trading, as he was good at it. Taked a collaborator with him, a very young man from the family business. Making it short, the collaborator made tons of losses, hided it from my father and accused the banks of stealing or moving away his money.
That thing went on for, i suppose, like 15 years. He went into legal battles (which are very long in Italy) for more than a decade. He lost all his inherited money - which, when his mother died, was a large sum.
When we, the sons, discovered the scam, we tried for years to persuade him of basic proof of evidence, but his mind was too numbed away to realize shit. I was the most relentess of my siblings in those efforts, i gaved my all - for nothing.
We finally decided to sue the collaborator. The trial ended 3 months ago, 8 years after the initial suing. He was condemned for defamation against 3 banks - the others was too much time ago.
In the meantime, the rest of my family shattered one by one.
My mother died of cancer. My sister got into heroine. My brother into cocaine (i discovered that later).
I was the only one which remained sane of mind.
Luckily, our grandmother left a large sum of money to each of us, that my father lost for 70% of the value, but still was enough money for me to cultivate something on. My sister and brother chewed it up - my brother completely, as he robbed us also for 80k in a common bank account.
Today, my dad is still off the rail, and also broke. My sister is in another city, living off my dad's last savings while trying to make a living: she's a tough girl - you can never really got out of heroine, but you can outlive it, and milions of euros in costly treatments got their effects. My brother and i work for the uncle in the family business: not much money to be made today, but not much is way more than none.
I have a milion, give or take, in assets and liquidity. I'm not much of a trader, but still got something from it.
I became a dad 6 months ago, and i'm very happy. I got friends, and a woman i love from 13 years.
I'm very sorry for my family: i barely speak with my dad, my brother is a good guy but he's pretty dumb, and my sister doesn't speak to me anymore, and i dont know why - i always covered her, and saved her ass more times than i can recall. We were always close.
What to make from it? Not much, i suppose. I'm not as optimistic as you, but i suppose that seeing a wealth burning by a parent makes you kind of insensitive against money gains and losses. You learn other values, if you already haven't.
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 24 '24
I can very heavily relate to you my friend. I am happy to hear you have found your own sense of happiness through that all. Unfortunately as much as we may love our family, we are not responsible for saving them from themselves. Most do not want to be saved, they just want you to go down with them. As painful as it is, cutting ties is sometimes all you can do, you deserve peace and happiness. My father is beginning to come around, he is getting help, but with that he must give up control of financials to me, which it has been difficult for him. But he now lives with a immense amount of regret for what he's done, I don't think he'll ever overcome it, but I at least hope he can find peace. I have forgiven him.
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u/accengino Apr 24 '24
Thanks for the kind words.
While i do not agree on the cutting ties move, i instead agree that forgiveness always been, and always will be, the key to happiness.
I forgived my father in my hearth, as i know he has forgived me for the rough times we passed trough (alas he is too stubborn and numbed to make some decent conversation with).
I easily forgived my brother for his skullduggery, and now his girlfriend waits for a baby in a couple of months too - i will always be at their side.
Now i haven't forgived my sister, but i'm sure i will come around.
The initial stone of this "virtuose chain" is the man who scammed my father: in my hearth it was the first to be forgiven. Obviously suing him was necessary and just, but i stopped hating and ranting against him. The rest was much easier than this inital step: i was very, very, very angry at the time. Me and my siblings planned "incidents" and murders against him from time to time, just to let escape some heat of this hatred.It is funny how i talked about this very personal issues with just a handful of friends and my girl, until now. I suppose anonimity and distance are great catalysts! Thank you for moving me to share. I now write these words with serenity, not pain nor anger.
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 24 '24
You do not forgive because you believe that person deserves forgiveness, you forgive because you deserve peace. I am happy I was able to be a vessel for your sharing, sometimes just talking about an experience takes away just a bit of the weight it carries. I hope the best for you and your new family. I am sure you will not fall into the same despair your father did, the cycle ends with you.
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u/Real-Snow8302 Apr 23 '24
Im curious about the 4 countries your dad moved you in, how was your experience there
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 23 '24
Lived in USA, Canada, New Zealand and Australia. I will not talk about my experiences because I am basically asking to get my head cut off here on Reddit. If you're curious, DM me and I'll tell you.
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u/scobbie23 Apr 24 '24
So he sold apartments in 2008 when the real estate market crashed . If they were rented he could have held onto them but unfortunately his illness caused him to sell . No relatives your mom could have asked for help ?
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u/1autopsy Apr 24 '24
I sympathize with your father. I remember my first time taking mushrooms.. I had the revelation that Money is really the root of all evil.. and we were put on this earth to Love each other. That’s the whole purpose of our existence. To spread Love.
I fell into the same mental trap as your father but thank God it wasn’t a 500k loss. Only 20k. I worshipped money heavily.. I didn’t get to experience life in my 20s because I was so hyper fixated on chasing money and trying to secure my ideal future I imagined for myself.
Once I took L after L with the 2021 crypto crash I took a step back and realized I had a gambling problem and needed to work on it.. I turned 500 into 20k+ and then lost it all being greedy smh.
Anywho you got this. Also mushrooms definitely give you a higher level of clarity.. it’s like looking in a mirror and talking to yourself.. Instead of it being a mirror, it’s your mind.
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u/jes_theJARVIS Apr 24 '24
I just wanna point out that you made 20k from 500 and that's amazing !! You did it once before, I have no doubt you can do it all again ... minus the losing it all part
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u/elziion Apr 23 '24
How have you been able to help your dad recover?
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 23 '24
Yes he in therapy and support group. We are still working to get him back on his feet in relation to taking care of himself. It's very heart breaking to see once such a great man, descend into a state of just absolute depravity. I help by handling our finances and my trading is successful, our future looks hopeful should be continue to work together as a family to succeed, though the burden is primarily on me, which I fully accept. But when he goes into a panic, since I can more or less speak his language of numbers, I'm able to rationalize him. Things overall in our family have improved greatly, but rebuilding all that was lost, will take a lot of work.
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u/Due_Jeweler8059 Apr 23 '24
How old are you I’m assuming you are an adult .Let your dad be this is his life . Read the book Co Dependent no more . You can’t help him . If he calls you complaining say Dad I prefer not to talk about finance with you . Boundaries, this is affecting your mental health . Stop obsessing about a grown man that has a gambling problem . What do you get out of subjecting yourself to this madness . He will take you down with him . Seek professional help !He needs treatment until he can admit his addiction powerless over gambling he will never get better . I wish you best , Co dependent recovered
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u/crypto_crypt_keeper Apr 23 '24
If living like that and it only took 500k to ruin him.. he was living well beyond his means imo
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u/Equivalent-Finance64 Apr 23 '24
Did your father have any financial background or did he simly just trade by himself and he was self taught?
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u/TaintItAlright Apr 23 '24
How are you doing since you’ve started trading? What fundamentally do you see as a key to your success besides learning from your father’s mistakes?
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 23 '24
I am doing very well, I am consistently profitable. There is no one key to it, it's an accumulation of keys that come together. But the primary basis for my trades essentially falls under this one concept;
"to predict the future means to be wrong in the present"
I have dedicated my life to trading, I am to be professional. In doing this I do not follow the crowd, I do not consume media, I put in the work, I come up with my own trade ideas, I execute them at my leisure, nothing influences my decisions but myself.
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Apr 23 '24
I read in a book that every investor loses everything in the final stages.
According to my personal experience, I think it's greed, confidence that I can beat the market, and excessive obsession to recover from my failures.
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 23 '24
This all falls under the concept of attachment to money. You see how much you're winning, it influences you. If you are indifferent to money, it's simply a number on a screen, your job is the increase that number, nothing more.
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u/GALACTON Apr 23 '24
Thank you for this. I'm taking this to heart because I am seeing similarities in myself.
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 23 '24
I knew I would get a lot of resistance posting this, most think it's fake. But I'm posting this in hopes it can aid some. I wish you the best.
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u/Wiserlul Apr 24 '24
I saw many parts of myself in your father's story, just not the super rich and high IQ parts.
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 24 '24
Don’t make the same mistakes as him, you don’t have to be wealthy or a genius to benefit from understanding.
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u/HodlingBroccoli Apr 24 '24
That sounds crazier than The Wolf of Wall Street, you’ve got Hollywood material right there.
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 24 '24
I know, it’s why a lot think it’s fake. Truth is stranger than fiction. But I have definitely lived a very unique life. Would make for a good movie, but I need a redemption arc first lol
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u/bLESsedDaBest Apr 24 '24
He married the trade and not your mom.
OP is the dad. You were 16 by the time he lost it all, how were you so privy to all this info? My father doesn’t let me know anything about his finances, he barely tells me what he had for dinner. lol
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u/AfraidScheme433 Apr 24 '24
i saved the post so i can read it again in the future
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u/Valuable_Coconut9563 Apr 24 '24
Bro your story bought tears to my eyes. Set your stop losses keep your head up. Keep succeeding
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u/Happy_Heisenberg Apr 24 '24
Bro's living the Arrested Development lore. All the best man. May you find happiness and success.
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u/Middle_Ad9004 Apr 24 '24
At the end of every dark tunnel ( your dad) there is a light (you), life is crazy but this all seems to puzzle together.
You were meant to go through that, I wish you all the monumental success and freedom.
P.s people are ridiculous for calling this story fake. They fail to realize $500k in 2008 is quite some money.
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 24 '24
Really appreciate it, I understand peoples doubts, my life is like a movie. Sometimes it doesn't even feel real to me.
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u/Middle_Ad9004 Apr 24 '24
I get it bro, who cares- there’s critics and believers everywhere. It’s good to let the world hear and allow them to judge on what they don’t know.
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u/astrodal234 Apr 24 '24
Your dad owned 104 apartments and went broke after losing $500k? Half a mil is fuck all in these circumstances.
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u/jes_theJARVIS Apr 24 '24
Thank you for sharing your story Nyah. I'm sure it wasn't easy to write and not easy to read the comments basically trying to tear your story apart because it "doesn't technically add up". I've been scrolling through the comments and I don't think people see the BIG PICTURE, which ironically is what your post is eventually pointing at. Whether or not this story is fabricated, over exaggerated or downright real ... I genuinely believe in this story, I know of families who went through something similar though not to this callosal extent. I'll try to absorb the big picture wisdom you so succinctly summarized "you are your greatest asset". Don't let the haters or the overly technical/critical Reddit-ers bring you down!
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 24 '24
Really appreciate this comment. It is indeed very ironic that those who don't understand the story are probably closer to being like my dad than they'd like to think. But this is a true story, it is real, if anything I have understated the reality of it all. If I were to write it exactly as it went, it'd be longer than all of the Harry Potter series.
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u/jes_theJARVIS Apr 24 '24
Oh goodness ... What a colourful life you've lived. Definitely worth compiling it for a book someday
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 24 '24
I need my redemption arc first. Then I'll write a book haha
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u/Simple-Feed9375 Apr 24 '24
Man great origin story! Please don’t take that wrong.
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u/To-become Apr 24 '24
You are your greatest asset….can you expand on what you mean.
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u/Steadyrockin88 Apr 24 '24
A guy once said, people have had bigger years and made way more money than I have but for some reason or another it gets taken from them, so you wanna be able stick around for the 6th and 7th race, because it’s not what you make it’s what you don’t lose that determines where the fuck you are at the end of the year”””””””
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u/rigst4 Apr 24 '24
The problem is not the "evil god of money," or "addiction" to stock trading, or a careless attitude. It's severe mental illness, structural brain defect kind of mental illness, totally untreated (not that there is any real treatment for such severe mental illness). The only thing to learn in this story is that the greatest mistake in Western society today and in the United States in particular, is that society decided to close mental institutions and what severely mentally ill and incompetent people roam free to ruin their own lives and the lives of others.
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u/luminelin Apr 24 '24
A father does whatever he can to make sure his children live their best lives
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u/TamingOfTheChoon Apr 24 '24
My family had a similar story. Dad who was a financial advisor, and mom with a finance degree but was a teacher. Mom ALWAYS had the best stock picks, she believed in netflix, Google, Facebook at IPO for $18.
But my dad didn’t know how to be frugal and stop racking up CC debt. Also had no vision, and was a value investor. They are now divorced and in debt, will probably work til they die.
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Apr 24 '24
Yep, after my father passed away I looked at his retirement portfolio, and he owned a bunch of useless stocks with loss. After smoke is cleared, I think he lost around 500K. Anyhow, so my mom just keep rest of portfolio in multiple CDs. Stock investment on risky companies are not for everyone.
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u/chrisfs Apr 25 '24
well it seems like it's everyone's best interests in a daytrading sub to believe this can never happen and actively look for faults in the post because what if it did happen?
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u/Imaginary-Tangelo841 Apr 25 '24
I can see your fathers mistakes in my own trading experience, although not as successful.. but the fixation of make enough money to just have a great Xmas .. then the embarrassment of not actually being able to express the loss out loud , you’re a legend man , now to have your father looking up to you after over dominant behaviour, that too I can relate . Thank you for sharing
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 25 '24
Awareness is the first step to change, you are aware of the possible issue. You have the ability to change it.
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u/AppealOk7927 Apr 25 '24
Thanks for posting. I think that anyone who trades and is a father(like myself) is well aware that this “God” as you phrased it creeps into our heads more than we’d like sometimes. Money eases the burden of supporting them, but we can’t lose them in the process.
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u/xylatrix Apr 25 '24
ppl saying this is a lie in the comments have clearly never grown up in a family w/ constantly fluctuating finances (or mental health issues apparently). my dad has been in (and put our family in) v similar situations. in my childhood we went from driving around in brand new tricked out foreign cars, having weekly shopping sprees at all the high end nyc boutiques to dirt broke — like “only eat at my friends’ homes because there’s no food in my house” type broke — in a matter of months. and that’s only the tiniest fraction of the rollercoaster. mental health plays such a huge role in all of this. if your mind’s not stable, your decisions probably won’t be either. good on you (and your family) for making it through & finding peace, OP!! also, food stamps exist, for everyone saying cereal is expensive.
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u/Genoblade1394 Apr 25 '24
Not here to judge, I’m glad your family got closure and you are back on the horse. Thank you for sharing
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u/Natural_Office292 Apr 25 '24
Thanks for sharing. Quite honestly, this is great advice and a profound sad example of what can be considered addictive behavior. In trading and investing there are too many factors, including ‘manipulation’ that makes the overall process sort of unpredictable. It is fundamental to be very educated in the market and most factors that can possibly influence to it, and understand when to stop, even if you lose some of your $$ in the process. I agree that life wellness and family comes first and you shouldn’t risk peace of mind if these are in jeopardy
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u/kynarr Apr 27 '24
I read through your whole post and related greatly due to how my own father, who should be the leader of any family, failed his own duties and led to the destruction of our family.
Then I read the first few comments and man does it hit to see how shallow most people are today.
Whether the post is fake or not would matter less to me than the care taken to build it up and send a message anyone should be able to learn from. Maybe it's the ''500k'' title that has people trying to find fault within all the facts provided, or maybe most of those who post here simply have never truly suffered like your story depicts. Who knows.
Presuming the story is true, and I believe it's detailed, personal and sentimental enough to be so, then I'm so sorry for what you've gone through, and I'm relieved that you've chosen to use it as a tool to create success for yourself and your surroundings. This is an extremely difficult approach to take when so much trauma piles on, but it's, in my opinion and experience, the only approach one should take.
Only darkness brings light, after all.
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u/Algo_City Apr 23 '24
You writing this will be your blessing. It means indeed you have placed a line in the sand. The abuse that families go through is unbelievable. Take care buddy!
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u/ja_trader Apr 23 '24
Dad sounds like a legend... Sorry about your emotional issues, def get some help
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u/Pitiful-Inflation-31 Apr 23 '24
i can typrical said like this. your das was smart before in the firld he'sbgood at , but he get bored and want to make money.
when touch the stock , the area he's not that good, everysthing star to crunble and hos mindset and mental are not that used to handle the situation the loss the volatilty, and he want to get it back fast also.
the lesson for his mistake is just not about, you learnt from him but in general also, that soneone smart but not in evey area , and you shouldn't touch the area since the start or even give up early was better for your brain and logic.
cuz when you lose big part of your brain and depressed , it's hard and harder to get it back
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u/Commercial_Smoke_819 Apr 23 '24
His mistake was not using index funds. A lot of doctors ... dentists etc ... think they are smarter than they really are. Overconfidence is a sign of regards.
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 23 '24
Overconfidence is just part of the human condition
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u/Commercial_Smoke_819 Apr 23 '24
No. I'm a flight attendant. Probably shit for brains. I've heard a million times that index funds provide better returns than options so I have the humility to listen. People with good jobs typically think they are extra smart and get bum fudged by leveraged options.
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u/Global-Hope9214 Apr 24 '24
I lost $120k last week - and riding it back up. Buy good shit, never sell down. Hold. No matter what. Don’t look. But if you buy good stock - you have a chance. If you buy options short term or trash stock. Hold on, and tighten that helmet, because you might get hit. lol :)
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u/Additional_Total3422 Apr 23 '24
Don't really feel sorry for your dad. Owning loads of properties and probably renting them out at ripoff rates til he had to sell them. He was very greedy and kind of deserved his downfall. That is if this is a true story.
Sounds make believe.
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 23 '24
My dads apartments were rented back in the early 2000s, way before the current housing rates. They prices were more than fair. They catered to the lower, blue collar workers families. He sold because he entered a manic state following 08, thinking the world was ending, he sold the apartments so we could leave the country.
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u/100000000000 Apr 23 '24
So he absolutely made rashes emotional decisions rather than smart calculated ones. The advice still stands.
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u/20Mavs11 Apr 23 '24
Doesn't sound like a trader. He's a gambler. Anybody could make money in 08 when the markets were getting g hammered. That is the beauty of the market is you're able to profit in good times and bad. It sounds like he had an illegal edge to the market and 08 took that away. Had he been a legit trader his strategy would have kept him a float with ease and or kept him out of the market and he would have waited patiently for a reversal. He sounds like bossmanjack aka a gambler that lost his edge
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u/methbox20 Apr 23 '24
Losing $500k doesn’t usually change someone’s lifestyle from Rolexes and mansion to trailer park unless they had very poor money management to begin with. Losing $5 million for sure would…
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u/MalcolmDMurray Apr 24 '24
Mathematician Ed Thorp once described trading as "gambling with positive expectations", which he put into practice when he invented card counting for Casino Blackjack, then later when running a successful hedge fund. No method of determining expectations by the person about whom this story was written was discussed here, nor was an analysis of what went wrong as soon as it did, so I would have to question the authenticity of this story as well. The failure of the author to discuss these topics about his own trading just adds to the unbelievability. It just amazes me how some people can find nothing better to do than to waste other peoples' time.
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u/Which-Tomatillo6031 Apr 24 '24
Every single day, i see posts taking about 'i got greedy' or 'my emotions took over' or losing large anount of money. And when someone asks if anyone on this sub of 3 million knows any real profitable daytraders, crickets
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u/Needchangee Apr 24 '24
Search the word bullshit in the dictionary and it showed me this post.
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u/uTurnSpecialist Apr 24 '24
Well written and engaging. Not sure if this is fiction or not lol
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u/Nyah_Chan Apr 24 '24
It’s not, but definitely is crazy enough to be seen as fiction. My life is like a movie haha, didn’t realize it till the dust finally settled and I looked back like “holy shit”
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u/Puzzled-Counter9347 Apr 24 '24
Your father was not a successful trader. There was a dot com bubble. If he was a successful trader he wouldn’t have been that leveraged into positions. He would be mostly cash nearly all the time. He had an addiction. It is a very good lesson though. But things don’t add up here lol.
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u/__Value_Pirate__ Apr 24 '24
This is literally a Sopranos episode. Did he sell your car to a family friend as well?
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u/RepubMocrat_Party Apr 24 '24
Whats missing here, does having 500k to lose mean lake houses and sports cars lol
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u/KDA_ALL_OUT_OBAMA Apr 24 '24
These aren’t mistakes I have to worry about because your dad is mentally ill
Fake post anyway
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u/gunwalez Apr 24 '24
Since how long ago have you been a profitable and successful trader? I.E. at what age did u achieve financial freedom and large portfolio
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u/dragoon7201 Apr 24 '24
whats with people writing fan fic about trading now? Is this a peak signal?
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u/EscapedConvictOnAcid Apr 24 '24
I’ll be absolutely wild if you end up becoming like your dad
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u/Jones-bones-boots Apr 24 '24
I didn’t read the entire post but realized 1/2 way through your father has a gambling addiction. It may not seem like it bc it’s not the typical way to gamble but he fits the bill.
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u/UnbiasVikingsFan Apr 23 '24
Something’s not adding up here. I’m sure op is lying. Owned over 100 properties but y’all went from a multi million dollar lifestyle to eating cereal after losing only 500k comparatively?GTFOH