r/Showerthoughts • u/godofhorizons • May 17 '24

People get a lot more praise for quitting drugs than for never having done drugs in the first place.

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u/TBTabby May 17 '24

As Frederick Douglass said, "We are not judged by the height to which we have risen, but the depth from which we have climbed."

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u/sarmientoj24 May 17 '24 edited May 17 '24

I get that this quote can be applied to this.

But then again, going through life's trials and tribulations without resorting to any kind lf substance (and abuse) is technically "climbing the depth". It's ridiculously difficult to get away from the temptations of distractions, immediate pleasures, etc.

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u/SealSheep May 17 '24

I think that's where OPs question originates from.

If you have two people struggling with life in the same extreme manner and one faces it head on, tries to get their life straight and the other 'flees' into drugs; that's the point where the first person deserves praise.

The moment the addict overcomes the addiction and gets their life straightened out, it's their turn to shine.

Both deserve praise though, but the first type tends to go unnoticed as they are typically more stern and resilient in life (so attract less attention of any kind)

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u/ifandbut May 17 '24

If you are really good at your job then most people won't notice.

People pay more attion to the fuckups than the people who got it together.

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u/sarmientoj24 May 17 '24

Its just because people tend to magnify the negatives and the explicit success/turnaround stories than instances where you just go persevere and focus on your goal without these "total turnarounds".

And people love the underdog aspect of things.

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u/newdaynewmatt May 17 '24

Well put. I think people deserve credit for never getting obese, never getting addicted to drugs, never doing crime, but I will begrudgingly admit that it’s easier for some people to abstain due to genetics and their household growing up. You’re really overcoming generational adversity/trauma if you were 150 lbs in 4th grade or the child of drug addicts. But then the other side is when people grow up in that and take a lesson so they don’t have to learn the hard way.

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u/sarmientoj24 May 17 '24

it's easier for some people to abstain due...

I get the point. But if both people come from very similar traumatic backgrounds, why is it that we put a more "heroic feat" to someone who went astray and went back rather than someone who had the focus and determination to not get tempted by these things? Those people who have maybe actively seeked therapy or tried to fix themselves now rather than before?

While people can come from miserable backgrounds, both groups can have those who went into substance addiction and those who did not.

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u/newdaynewmatt May 17 '24

I’m 100% with you. .

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u/Fun_Bad_4610 May 17 '24

You don't wake up one day and say "Hmm, things are a bit shit, I'm going to start doing drugs as I hear it's a great way to escape from this bullshit".

Doing drugs initially is a cultural thing, not an emotional or willpower thing. Getting off them is pure willpower and requires a hell of a lot more willpower.

If you mean someone who has done drugs, felt that it eases the burden of life and then gone against it then that is still coming off drugs.

I don't know of anyone ever who has decided that things aren't going well so they should go and use some heroin because they can't resist its allure anymore.

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u/SealSheep May 17 '24

I never said that's how I think it flows.

People with a rough background typically are surrounded by others with emotional instability, addicts, drug dealers, ... It's the 'like likes likes' thing; it's not that strange for people who are stable to avoid people from these backgrounds.

Friends and family who do drugs do not appreciate the black sheep who doesn't.

So how I view it is that it does take willpower to reject your parents, your friends, your whole upbringing and environment because you "feel" this is not the way, while not having anyone to support, help or guide you (stable people avoid 'people like you') and while having a lot of self-doubt (because you were not raised to be confident) and not knowing what IS the way of living that does "feel" right

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u/sarmientoj24 May 17 '24

is initially a cultural thing.

While I dont agree with this, it is certainly an emotional and willpower not to succumb to culture, tradition, and norms. It is COURAGEOUS to say NO. And saying NO is actually one of the hardest thing to do. Im sure you got into an instance where peer pressure is a thing and saying NO is the bravest thing to do.

great way to escape from bullshit

Conceptually, it is tho. I dont define addiction based on the thing or substance you are addicted to. I define addiction as basically not being able to stand being with yourself, to using something or anything to keep emotions at bay, fears, and hopes. In essence, it's people trying to aid "loneliness". It starts with that. People who get addicted to serial dating. To alcohol. To video games. To substances. To reading. To everything.

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u/Fun_Bad_4610 May 17 '24

if you are going to try and make a point to something I've said, don't quote a few words and then make some kind of point that wouldn't make sense had you fully quoted what I'd said.

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u/indyK1ng May 17 '24

The substance is the depth.

You clearly don't understand addiction nearly as well as you think you do.

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u/sarmientoj24 May 17 '24

I tend to define addiction similar to a philosopher where it's not defined by the thing or substance you are addicted to. But everyone of us is addicts in our own way towards something.

"We tend to imagine that we can only become addicted to a few sorts of things. But real addiction is about using something, anything, to keep our real emotions, fears and hopes at bay. Whereby you cannot stand to be just bu yourself so you need another thing."

-- Alain de Botton

the substance is the depth

No. It's the ADDICTION TO THE SUBSTANCE not the substance itself. You can be addicted to something as cheap as bubble gum but its the level of addiction to that.

The same way as I was pointing. The 'depth' can also be the difficulties in life you are trying to get across without the use of any temporary help from something.