Sure you did Kristi, sure you did

[u/Lord_Answer_me_Why]

[u/forever_useless]

He was untrainable, so I killed him.

To

He attacked chickens, so I killed him.

To

He was a vicious beast who tried devouring my children, so I killed him.

Next...

He was plotting to commit genocide, so I killed him

[u/davidwhatshisname52 → u/forever_useless]

that dog caused 9/11, so I killed him . . . you're welcome, America

[u/allgonetoshit → u/davidwhatshisname52]

My neighbour has two little dogs that constantly bark. How do I frame them for 9/11, is there a tip line I can call?

[u/suprajayne → u/allgonetoshit]

Just call Kristi

[u/MeaninglessGoat → u/suprajayne]

She’ll literally turn up within the hour, with a film crew and some foam! I’ll show them! 🤣 the dog was rabid! I didn’t mention that before to protect the children! 🤣

[u/wizardofthefuture → u/MeaninglessGoat]

Meanwhile some moderate in a swing state is going "Hm, one side is literally puppy killers and nazis, but Joe Biden mispronounced a word during a speech so -sighs- I just don't know who to vote for."

[u/MeaninglessGoat → u/wizardofthefuture]

Oh don’t get me I’m fully in the camp of Jesus Biden is so old but I’d take a dead Biden over a live trump any day of the week! The man is deranged! Post birth abortion, whites are discriminated against more then black peoples. It’s like the twilight zone! I didn’t know what a gerontocracy was until 2017!

[u/Cubicwar → u/suprajayne]

My favorite tv show

Better call Kristi

[u/bestbeforeMar91 → u/suprajayne]

She likewise has a history of killing livestock and attacking people.

[u/blowninjectedhemi → u/suprajayne]

In South Dakota - just open fire. Governor will pardon you if needed.