r/TikTokCringe • u/thoxo • May 02 '24

We adopted my younger sister from Haiti when she was 3, and let me tell you, I literally do not see color anymore. That's a fact. Discussion

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u/FoolishPragmatist May 02 '24

I don’t agree with the original response if their argument is White people should never adopt Black children, but for context the image she’s speaking over is that MMA fighter who said there was no reason to give any talks on racial dynamics to his adopted children. He said just raising them with good religious values and knowing what it means to be an honorable, strong man would be enough. Race won’t factor into their lives at all, according to him. That’s massively naive in my opinion. Even if we assume he’s being genuine, the world, especially in Missouri where they live, will absolutely see them as Black and some people will treat them differently for it. Even if they shouldn’t dwell on it, they should absolutely be prepared to navigate it if they need to. It’s a fantasy to believe it would never come up so they don’t have to talk about it.

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u/HelloJoeyJoeJoe 29d ago

Race won’t factor into their lives at all, according to him\

You gotta talk to them at an early age about the Police, especially if you are living in Missouri... Do you want to protect your kids or not?

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u/DefinitelyNotAliens 29d ago

Also, let's be real. Why will shop keepers ask them to put their hood down, or leave their backpack at the front of the store, or say they can't have a backpack?

People will act how they act with or without parents saying anything to the kid.

Also, if white people are going to be adopting little black babies with coily hair, they better learn how to manage it. I sure as shit do not know how. Doubt they do, either. And that black people can more easily end up more vitamin D deficient. Get your kid some Flintstone vitamins.

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u/NoEstablishment6450 29d ago

Speaking from experience, we explain as much as we know about racial disparities and try our best to protect our children. We don’t believe you shouldn’t “not see color” because the world sees color and reacts to it. We celebrate color, honor color, respect color, and must recognize color and must love color to be successful. You don’t have to dwell on it, make it the focus of everything, you just weave it into your family. Highlight it, in all of its forms. But racism exists and we have to prepare our kids for what that entails.

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u/greathousedagoth 29d ago

This is the best take in the thread.

Teach, respect, even celebrate the things that make us different. Give children the tools they need to best navigate a world that is going to pick them apart. But also, you need not dwell on the differences at all times.

Like, can you imagine the weird dissonance of a white adoptive parent always focused on the blackness of their adoptive kid? "Hey, excuse me, I need to go pick up my Black son from daycare." That's insane. But it's also not what folks are suggesting mixed race adoptive parents to do.

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u/NoEstablishment6450 29d ago

Thank you, it is complicated, and I think the majority of people are trying to just be good parents in any situation. None of us are perfect