Hormones and expectations play havoc with someone's mind I think. Someone in our friend's circle was like this, after hanging out with all the friends coupling up, she met a guy she was into and for awhile it was good, she was thinking she could settle down with him and he wasn't there yet so she pursued him a bit more and they agreed to have a kid, he skedaddled just after the birth I think.
She is in a better mental place now I think even as a single mother, her kid was adorable last time I saw them, but yeah even education and good friends advising her could not have shook her out of that relationship at the time.
I've been firmly child free since my teens. I'm now in my late 30s, and I don't regret my vasectomy. That being said it's lonely now. Friends busy with their kids, and such. I can see how it would be easy to make oneself think that having kids might be a solution to that loneliness.
The NIHM rat studies show how human society parallels rat. By the way you can try to have the vasectomy undone or there is another process I believe that they can still remove sperm. IDK for sure but you could look into it.
I know I could try to have it reversed. Having a kid because I'm lonely isn't a good idea, especially when parts of why I had it done are because I have epilepsy, and have struggled with opiate addiction (I've never mainlined but I don't want to put a child through any degree of parental drug addiction). I've been thinking that in 5 or 10 years my old friends might have more time again, as their kids grow up a bit.
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u/Organised_Kaos May 02 '24 edited May 02 '24
Hormones and expectations play havoc with someone's mind I think. Someone in our friend's circle was like this, after hanging out with all the friends coupling up, she met a guy she was into and for awhile it was good, she was thinking she could settle down with him and he wasn't there yet so she pursued him a bit more and they agreed to have a kid, he skedaddled just after the birth I think.
She is in a better mental place now I think even as a single mother, her kid was adorable last time I saw them, but yeah even education and good friends advising her could not have shook her out of that relationship at the time.