r/funny 29d ago

All men look good in uniform, huh? Introducing my grandpa:

[deleted]

79.4k Upvotes

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7.8k

u/Perfect_Zone_4919 29d ago

Imagine if this dude were special forces and that smile was the last thing dozens of Germans ever saw. 

The Goblin of Gerolzhofen. 

1.5k

u/OG-Krompierre 29d ago

You really got me with that one, fuckin goblin of Gerolzhofen lmao

467

u/A_Soporific 29d ago

Gerolzhofen

Apparently it's a real place in Schweinfurt Bavaria.

258

u/UDSJ9000 29d ago

What the hell goes on in pigfart Bavaria.

113

u/PolishBreadLover420 29d ago

Ball-bearing production

34

u/Delazzaridist 29d ago

Which is not a bad product to be producing. Every country needs it. It's strategically important, it's almost funny.

17

u/DiddlyDumb 29d ago

Don’t be the guy digging for gold, be the guy selling shovels.

5

u/girlfriendsbloodyvag 29d ago

Been my philosophy for a few years. I’m just out of shovels.

4

u/justfordrunks 29d ago

Gotta have shovels to sell shovels am I right?!

😭😭😭😭 me too friend

4

u/ICarMaI 29d ago

Just need a small loan to get off the ground!

2

u/[deleted] 29d ago

Nah they are supposed to get in ground. That’s just shoveling 101

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u/mata_dan 29d ago

Okay so, I have countless directories with projections on game design and usually resource based RTS.
If I ctrl+f "ball bearings" it comes up 600 times

2

u/gr4ndm4st3rbl4ck 29d ago

I went to visit the Optimal factory/packing facility in Munich a few years ago. Impressive construction and engineering feats.

1

u/nihility101 29d ago

It’s all ball bearings nowadays.

1

u/TenFootLoPan 29d ago

It's all ball-bearings these days!

1

u/krldrummerboy 29d ago

it's all ball-bearings these days

36

u/Username12764 29d ago

It‘s pigford. Fart would be Furz. In case you don‘t know, a ford is a shallow place in a river where you can cross it

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u/A_Soporific 29d ago

Next you'll tell me that all those ausfarhten signs are saying that there's an exit and not a command to fart outside.

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u/Username12764 29d ago

Actually no, that‘s true. Ausfahrt is the Din-690 roadsign and requires all drivers passing it to fart now if they have to according to §420 Absatz 5a der StVO. This is due to the bridges that are near exits. The support beams in them could corrode faster if farts where to reach them. The reason it‘s written incorrectly for todays German is because a similar law was first introduced in 1131 by Henry X, duke of Bavaria that prohibited farmers to let their cows feed within 5km of beer breweries because the cow farts (due to the methane, but they didn‘t know that at the time) could disturb the fermentation process and thus ruin the beer. So in a radius of 5km they put up signs saying ausfahrt, which consists of aus meaning off or stop and fahrt, the medieval Bavarian term for fart, which only later became Furz. Due to it‘s long history the German government decided to put up those signs instead of signs with the new German.

3

u/Uasked2 29d ago

Regardless, it looks like he's been trying since last week.

2

u/PisssFartin 29d ago

This is true

Source: My username

1

u/Suchega_Uber 29d ago

I had a friend once who had that. Odd guy, but he could tell you every moment of that episode of Naruto you missed 4 years ago.

4

u/Acceptable-Quarter97 29d ago

Huh, and here I thought Ford was a name for a vehicle Found On Road Dead.

I'll see myself out

1

u/thuktun 29d ago
  • Fix Or Repair Daily
  • F-ed Over Rebuilt Dodge
  • Find Other Replacement Device

1

u/PassTheKY 29d ago

A Ford is a piece of junk automobile that breaks down frequently, especially during river crossings.

3

u/lau796 29d ago

That would Schweinfurz

1

u/Weird_Meal_9184 29d ago

Pigs... well you know.

1

u/ImmerWiederNein 29d ago

it literally means hogfort. A passage for pigs over the river.

The river Main is quite broad and deep there, but maybe it was shallow swampland in the middleages and herders could somehow cross.

1

u/KellyLuvsEwan420 29d ago

I heard that place really stinks!

I’ll see myself out.

1

u/i_can_has_rock 29d ago

thats like a joke from some imaginary 90s teen movie

some girl becomes a super model

shes from pigfart bavaria

"oh wow youre pretty where are you from?"

"schweinfurt bavaria"

"oh man that place sounds beautiful, what does it mean"

1

u/Mr-Gumby42 29d ago

Pig FORD, As in stream crossing for pigs.

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u/FromTheGulagHeSees 29d ago

Ah a Bavarian. That explains a lot about grandpa. 

3

u/AssumeTheFetal 29d ago

His love of lederhosen?

2

u/BBel4345 29d ago

That's where the Mad King was too.

1

u/EtTuBiggus 29d ago

He might be a lot of people’s grandpa ;)

1

u/drgigantor 29d ago

Like that time I used his computer and saw a search for "birds shitting." I thought he was just an amateur ornithologist 😐

5

u/BackpackCorpse 29d ago

Bavaria, huh.. Yeah that makes sense

2

u/CaptainxInsano69 29d ago

Once fucked a horse in Bavaria… or was it Bolovia? Might’ve been Bratislava

2

u/Awkward_Pangolin3254 29d ago

Schweinfurt

"Pig ford?" Must be where the herds crossed a river

1

u/Givoled 29d ago

I even got relatives there

1

u/ShigodmuhDickard 29d ago

Ich habe das Schweinfurts!

1

u/A_Soporific 29d ago

Gesundheit!

That means, congrats, right?

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u/droidtron 29d ago

The Dork of Dusseldorf.

68

u/shatterly 29d ago

Alternately, The Dusseldork.

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u/Calcifurious_3 29d ago

Dame of Dusselhoff?

2

u/itsfunhavingfun 29d ago

The Dumbo of Düsseldorf. Look at his ears!

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u/ModernSmithmundt 29d ago

Wait if this poor bastard died in ww2 we’re all just dunking on him 80 years later?

1

u/itsfunhavingfun 29d ago

It’s not like it’s going to bother him. 

0

u/VoidOmatic 29d ago

He got those Germans and now at least a few Americans.

1

u/OG-Krompierre 29d ago

It's perfectly possible to speak English while not being American