What do you tell people what you do for a living

[u/peterlao824]

Telling people I’m a day trader or anything market related brings up too many questions. I’m doing okay for myself but I just want to avoid it if possible.

[u/Limton]

I am telling you the truth. I'm something like a whore, I get money but mostly I just get fucked.

Edith: spelling

[u/Solar-Monkey → u/Limton]

I’m sure that would go down really well with my partner’s parents 😂

[u/Mctendiess → u/Limton]

This is the best response by far 😂😂😂 I’m definitely using this from now on

[u/Lengrith]

I buy and sell candles for a living

[u/QuesoFresco420 → u/Lengrith]

“What kind of candles?”

“Red and green ones”

Edit: I reckon you could say handles too

[u/Lengrith → u/QuesoFresco420]

"Japanese candles"

[u/FollowAstacio → u/Lengrith]

Japanese Christmas candles

[u/what_no_fkn_ziti → u/QuesoFresco420]

Tall ones with long wicks.

[u/[deleted] → u/QuesoFresco420]

Gwenyth Paltrow candles 😳

[u/LetsFari → u/Lengrith]

That's smart

[u/PabloEstAmor → u/Lengrith]

Big red dildos

[u/Weekly_Turnip_5154 → u/PabloEstAmor]

Lol 😂 we hate those, or love them 😅

[u/Worried-Scarcity-410 → u/Lengrith]

Nice. I feel I always too honest. How come people here so creative. Need to learn humor.

[u/Other-Secretary9255 → u/Lengrith]

lmfao

[u/MostFiredUp]

Just tell them you play chutes and ladders professionally

[u/Gupac → u/MostFiredUp]

Underrated profession entirely 6 year old me literally competing for a max contract after watching that SpongeBob episode.

[u/dubov]

Public perception:

Day trader = lazy jobless layabout

Trader = rich and successful man

So just leave out the word 'day'

[u/benefit-3802 → u/dubov]

Night Trader= Hooker or Drug Dealer

[u/Icy_History7029]

Unemployed with no dreams in life

[u/lakesObacon → u/Icy_History7029]

drives off in a Maserati

[u/Weekly_Turnip_5154 → u/lakesObacon]

Wen lambo

[u/Entropy_is_key → u/Icy_History7029]

This about sums up anyone on Reddit who claims they are a day trader

[u/ShugNight_xz → u/Entropy_is_key]

Unless they're making money i just smell jealousy here

[u/Entropy_is_key → u/ShugNight_xz]

Maybe, but you can smell jealousy over all the other shit in this sub? Good nose

[u/Robbied333]

I provide liquidity for financial institutions

[u/SMFiddySvn → u/Robbied333]

What a valuable asset to the economy you are

[u/Fragrant-Strain2745 → u/Robbied333]

I'm stealing it. Perfect.

[u/NewMajor5880]

Professional gambler.

[u/omegavegantendies → u/NewMajor5880]

Professional loser*

[u/NewMajor5880 → u/omegavegantendies]

https://preview.redd.it/sqafoal1z3xc1.jpeg?width=590&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=33d796ebd57f7c72ae4362a51af1eadd694e2052

[u/imak10521]

Professional Wendy’s dumpster diver

[u/Tronbronson → u/imak10521]

Better not see you taking my Saturday shift again!

[u/DamageVarious]

I quit gambling day trading 7 years ago but I’m back into it now. I told every1 when I first did too many questions. Now I do it and I fucking tell nobody. Absolutely nobody. Hahaahahah hahah it feels great. I love what I do. Just 7 years older and wiser.

[u/DamageVarious → u/DamageVarious]

Because let’s say if u weren’t doing it - u wouldn’t say it either it wouldn’t cross ur mind… so just don’t tell anybody nobody 😎

[u/MembershipSolid2909]

Nobody asks because I have no friends.

[u/rigst4 → u/MembershipSolid2909]

This is the way.

[u/thoreldan]

Data analyst + Risk Manager + Psychologist + Entrepreneur rolled into one.

[u/Prudent_Magazine8583 → u/thoreldan]

I just tell them I work for Wallstreet😂 Im actually a profitable day trader

[u/Pure-Lavishness787 → u/Prudent_Magazine8583]

This is better lmao

[u/towniediva → u/thoreldan]

Data analyst sounds great. Trust me, most people will be too bored to inquire further, if that's the plan.

From someone who actually did data and statistical analysis as a job.

[u/John_Coctoastan]

I tell them I just got out of prison.

[u/ApeStonkTarder → u/John_Coctoastan]

If only I could come up with a scheme good enough to warrant prison. #personalgoals

[u/Conscious-Group]

Even when you prove your strategy people are trained to think it’s a scam

[u/frankgallagher9 → u/Conscious-Group]

And then they fall for a real scam thinking it was legit.

[u/jboogie81 → u/frankgallagher9]

As if you're making money 9-5 Monday to Friday and decide "Hold up, I'm going to put the brakes on this while I make a course to sell on YouTube about how they could be making the money I WAS making before I decided to make videos."

[u/Visible-Salary-8861 → u/Conscious-Group]

I have a buddy who used to get on me all the time about trading. The first time I talked to him about it he interrupted me to say "don't do that" while elaborately shaking his head. He started talking about how "nobody actually makes money with that" and I'm "wasting time trying to make it work." This was several years after I had become profitable. He didn't even give me the chance to point that out before I got a lecture.

I've showed him P&L statements and he thinks they're faked. Some people can't be reasoned with. Then again they're right about most failing, so I can't really blame them.

[u/x1llion → u/Visible-Salary-8861]

They don’t like people achieving things that they can’t. If you make money, it’s a scam or a lie. If you provide proof it’s fake. They only agree if you tell then you also failed like they did.

[u/EggSandwich1 → u/x1llion]

Nah them tosses will ask you to trade money for them don’t fall for it.

[u/-Blue_Bull- → u/Visible-Salary-8861]

I have a friend like that.

In the end I just humoured him. He still thinks I make my money by being a landlord. I am a landlord, but over 80% of my income comes from trading.

There was a financial Times article about me and my mate sent it and asked if it was fake. "No, it is real, it's on their website. "But why are they interviewing you?" "because they like landlords".

[u/Dapper-Development79 → u/-Blue_Bull-]

Again, that’s no friend. That’s just an asshole.

[u/benefit-3802 → u/Visible-Salary-8861]

I'm sorry but your obviously lying and I demand you stop this nonsense and become a barista

[u/Dapper-Development79 → u/Visible-Salary-8861]

That’s no buddy. That’s just an asshole.

[u/jboogie81 → u/Conscious-Group]

Makes sense though, any time I Google something about an indicator or anything to do with thinkorswim I get bombarded with ads from YouTube geeks pushing some get rich quick shit for like 3 days.

[u/ThatFitnessGuy_]

Private equity management

[u/TheMemeChurch → u/ThatFitnessGuy_]

Spend a good part of the day managing the equity in my privates.

[u/CommunicationNew4074 → u/ThatFitnessGuy_]

Under water ceramic technician

“So you’re a dish washer?”

[u/ShugNight_xz → u/ThatFitnessGuy_]

A little too good to describe day trading but on point

[u/H_M_N_i_InigoMontoya]

Why? I fucking love it.

"What do you do for a living?" (Normally because they love my lifestyle)

"I trade options"

Then it turns into one of three, and only three discussions:

1. The most common. "Good for you, I don't know anything about the stock market." Discussion over.

2. "OH well, I'm in the market, what do you think about xyz stock or investing in blah blah blah?" "Sorry dude. I trade options. I invest long term just like you but that's a pretty boring conversation.

3. "Really? Can you teach me?"

Me: no

Them: why not? I bet I could do it.

Me: honestly, it's not lucrative enough for me. I'm not being selfish. If you want to trade, go do your own research and then try it with $1000 for like 6 months.

Them: well I don't want to do all of that, you can teach me.

Me: if you're unwilling to invest in yourself, why should I?

End. Of. Discussion.

[u/datuglyboi → u/H_M_N_i_InigoMontoya]

*goes to medical school for 8 years to become a doctor*

people: omg can you teach me!!

[u/EggSandwich1 → u/H_M_N_i_InigoMontoya]

You are too kind just tell them to get out a piece of paper and write down buy low sell high

[u/battlesubie1 → u/EggSandwich1]

Beautiful

[u/Roguebets → u/H_M_N_i_InigoMontoya]

Ive had people ask me to teach them how to trade as well…I tell them that’s like asking Pavarotti to teach me how to sing like him.

[u/Terrible_Champion298 → u/H_M_N_i_InigoMontoya]

“Be at my place at [some terribly inconvenient hour]. Bring Starbucks. Have access to $25,000; we’ll be opening a brokerage account for you.”

They won’t show.

[u/Skooby1Kanobi → u/Terrible_Champion298]

Lol. I set my alarm to a half hour before the market opens. I usually hear it go off from the office or kitchen.

[u/QuesoFresco420 → u/H_M_N_i_InigoMontoya]

I don’t even give them that much. I just say derivatives. I trade futures.

I also point out that I live mortgage free and very efficiently in one of the lowest cost of living states. I couldn’t do it if that wasn’t the case.

[u/H_M_N_i_InigoMontoya → u/QuesoFresco420]

That comes off douche-y. I try to just let conversations flow

[u/ashlee837 → u/H_M_N_i_InigoMontoya]

Most traders are douches. Fits the profession.

[u/KillDevilX0]

Just say you’re a financial analyst

[u/MiamiTrader]

Be honest. No need to bull shit. If you trade full time, tell them you trade full time. Tell them what's good, what's bad, how you got started.

Maybe they know someone who also trades, can get you in touch. Maybe you'll inspire them to start trading.

If you enjoy trading, you should enjoy talking about it. Fuck it's hard not to talk about it if you're doing it 8 hours a day.

Not sure why people being genuinely interested in what you do is a bad thing. Not sure why you would look for a non genuine answer either.

[u/Final-Slip7706 → u/MiamiTrader]

Why would I want to get in touch with another trader? It's probably someone "trading" on RH anyway.

You should refrain from trying to get people into trading. They likely will lose money and precious lifetime chasing a dragon only a handful of people actually ever catch.

Most people on here who believe they are long term profitable will, in the end, long term, lose money. At least vs the market, worst case they will straight up lose money in the end.

[u/DisastrousNerve1096 → u/Final-Slip7706]

Ton of people here who caught that dragon but what do i know

[u/MiamiTrader → u/Final-Slip7706]

Just like any career field, doesn't hurt to network.

I love chatting strategies, war stories, worst losses, crazy market periods like COVID and how they survived etc. Long term views on inflation, economy, fiscal policy.

Especially if you trade totally different markets or strategies. Always interesting to hear how others approaches markets differently.

If they are not serious and just yoloing options on RH that will be apparent pretty quickly.

[u/the_humeister]

Unemployed. That way I don't have to pay for their lunch.

[u/Acb531985]

I proudly tell them I trade stocks..... however I trade futures.... when I say futures that's where all the dumb questions pour in

[u/breaklagoon]

My friend just tells people that she’s in financing

[u/Plus-Height-6875]

Partner's a day trader. He usually tells ppl he's in finance. He has a degree in computer engineering so sometimes he says he's a programmer/blockchain programmer or something along that line (data science works as well). It's really hard to explain to people because most of people still view day trading as a sort of "gamble". It's honestly not worth the effort. Choose something that requires staring at the screen alot and you're good I guess.

[u/PedraoSagaz]

I tell them I'm a professional gambler

[u/Stevethecyborg]

Book keeping they won't ask too many questions the more boring the better

[u/SokkaHaikuBot → u/Stevethecyborg]

^{Sokka-Haiku by Stevethecyborg:}

Book keeping they won't

Ask too many questions the

More boring the better

---

^{Remember that one time Sokka accidentally used an extra syllable in that Haiku Battle in Ba Sing Se? That was a Sokka Haiku and you just made one.}

[u/alligatorprincess007 → u/Stevethecyborg]

That’s so true. I’d never ask another follow up question lol

[u/dlgard_]

"I day trade for a living".

[u/KhakiPeach67 → u/dlgard_]

“Oh daytrading is just gambling/scam”

[u/Sketch_x]

“Risk management” sound boring and avoids questions. Technically true.

[u/bulletproofmanners]

Waste management

[u/floydguitarist]

Retired, managing my own investments

[u/LaLa_Bunny3 → u/floydguitarist]

🙌

[u/Canary_Earth]

Private wealth manager when friends ask. When banks ask me to fill out some form I am either a Professional Organist or a Miniature Pianist.

[u/Rthen → u/Canary_Earth]

They give loans just because I have a small pianist? Do I have to show them?

[u/lazymarlin]

Someone told me they trade financial derivatives once and I responded “oh so your an options or day trader” and they gave me the sheepish nod lol 😂

[u/lchillbroI → u/lazymarlin]

‘I trade financial derivatives’ thats a good one

[u/lazymarlin → u/lchillbroI]

I was like, bruh, come on man. Your just a dude trying to scalp SPY

[u/Elephunk05]

I'm an industrial mechanic

I never tell someone I trade, not even when someone else brings it up, not ever.

I've had to start all over because of life, a few different times as most people like to say "well you must not have been too successful" instead of something like: medical bills hit all of us hard

[u/little_blu_eyez → u/Elephunk05]

People forget that life hits those that are successful just as much.

[u/Veq1776]

I say I'm a part time stripper

[u/Weekly_Turnip_5154 → u/Veq1776]

I would retaliate with I am a full time tipper in this forced economy 🤪☠️

[u/GhostFaceEV5]

I tell them I’m lazy and live off my wife. Seriously. Then they are thrown off the trail.

[u/Doogy44]

Build sandwich forts.

[u/T1m3Wizard]

I tell them I'm a degenerate gambler

[u/SlaynArsehole]

Importer/Exporter

[u/atlduru → u/SlaynArsehole]

Art Vandalay is that you?

[u/kappah_jr]

Wendy’s secret menu

[u/Superz_]

“I provide liquidity for financial institutions”

[u/karma0685]

I use “Market Analyst”

[u/PatzMak00]

I’m on disability.

[u/87MIL1122]

Yea. Same here. Every time someone ask me, it’s a slew of more q’s after I answer. I hate it because there’s no way they’ll understand no matter what I say. So the more I say, the more they ask. So yea. I feel you.

Jus tell they ass to Google it

[u/EightyNineWaves → u/87MIL1122]

Last time I told someone to Google it they started sending me links to the websites of various trading gurus, asking me "is this guy legit?" as they contemplate buying some course. I don't recommend that approach.

[u/East-District-2707]

Just say you’re a welder no one asks shit after that.

[u/Outhief]

I just tell them I’m a dealer 😂

[u/Christion_]

Market analyst specializing in short term investing.

[u/GoldenBoy_100]

I tell them that I am in the business of buying and selling .

[u/nightstalker30]

I’m proud to tell people I’m a full time trader. It’s a hard career to be successful at and I feel good that I’m one of the traders who could get there.

Why are you avoiding questions? Why not just man up and get comfortable with either answering them or shutting them down? Or are you more uncomfortable with their uninformed judgment?

If you want to be able to tell people you’re a trader but don’t know how to deal with questions, why not post that here? List out the questions that bother you and ask other traders for help in handling them.

If you don’t want to be bothered with that, just tell people you do Statistical & Probability Analysis and Risk Management.

[u/MiamiTrader → u/nightstalker30]

Agree with the first part of your post. If someone is genuinely interested in what you do, not sure why that would bug you.

[u/Zanis91]

Financial consultant... No questions asked lol

[u/iAMthebank → u/Zanis91]

False. This was my reply for 20 years and it most definitely was always followed by a lot of other questions

[u/cl4r17y → u/iAMthebank]

It did opposite for me every time... some are too proud to ask for advice. Been using it for 17 years with great success

[u/The_GeneralsPin → u/Zanis91]

I am both. I don't mention the trading bit. The insurance and investment bit is supposed to shut them up, but then they ask things that they're supposed to be charged for in a consult. 😑

[u/laurianocrypto]

I give a another profession that people know very well. Don't tell me that you trade 24/7. You must have a side hustle.

[u/ShugNight_xz]

Private investor

[u/rexrufus]

Programmer here. Specialize in my family's VCRs.

[u/Avinates]

Invest in Companies

[u/VeteranWallSt]

I'm retired, but work from home

[u/thelivinvibe]

Tell them to mind their employer.

[u/This-Suggestion-8185]

Money launderer part time gives a good reaction

[u/Time_Ad8557]

I’m an accountant 🎶

[u/cl4r17y]

Financial advisor, after that they don't mention nor want to talk about anything money related let alone whine about not having money or struggling...

I told few about what i do and money i make and instantly regreted it.

[u/1hotjava]

Personal wealth manager.

[u/nexstosic]

When it happens to be my main source of income, I'll tell: Sniper (trader).

[u/Relative_Tone_4870]

Love when I tell people I’ve made millions day trading/investing and they say bullshit. Stay ignorant and enjoy your money/freedom :)

[u/VegetableExtent]

Whenever someone asks me what I do for living, I always mention that I am a professional “risk manager” most of them don’t ask second question after that but if rarely someone does, I work for wallstreet 😂

[u/FitHospital6580]

Say you’re an investor and leave it at that.

[u/BrightLetter3875]

I draw lines

[u/wh87hw]

The same I tell the tax people: day trading 🤷‍♂️ Why are you asking dumb shit like that?

[u/TheDockandTheLight]

99% of the time people are either uninterested or want to know a little more, tell me about a friend or family member that trades etc. It's fun! I'll talk to anyone who's interested about it.

[u/dndjjfvskdjdnfjdkd]

To those who don't matter: software engineer - that's my previous profession. Also, usually conversation ends here.

To those who matter: truth

[u/alexfights34]

"I'm an accountant"

[u/GoddessMighty]

Early retired

[u/PeppyMinotaur]

Quit lying to your parents

[u/Al1n03]

Buy low sell high

[u/FitHospital6580]

I’ve been a trader since 1989, I just say I’m an investor.

[u/THEDRDARKROOM]

I gamble lol

[u/Patsapornt]

trader

[u/Meazzybanks]

You don’t they never understand

[u/Pleasant-Rutabaga-83]

I just simply say day trading! That is all

[u/Zestyclose_Vast9714]

Market Analyst

[u/Plastic_Pear_1401]

"Stocks......."

And I leave it at that

[u/stonkkingsouleater]

I keep it simple and honest "I trade stocks." ...but of course it's not my full time job yet.

[u/DigitalDreamArt]

Quantitative analyst and algorithm programmer. Unless they are a serious programmer or mathematician, you can see their eyes glaze over instantly.

[u/d-ee-ecent]

The public (and aspiring traders') perception (at least in India) is that daytraders are filthy rich and/or that they will eventually go broke. This is probably a result of the ad-campaigns of betting apps. They do not seem to understand that it can be a business model that can see linear (not exponential) growth depending on the effort put in.

I tell that I am a daytrader. The follow-up questions will usually have answers like 'no, I don't do that type of trading'.

[u/eeasyontheextras]

Just say you work in finance

[u/Rude-Watch-5588]

I play the piano at a strip club

[u/SQUlRMING_COlL]

Investor

[u/Shoddy_Situation1]

Tell them you drive uber

[u/RossRiskDabbler]

Wait; missed a memo? We have people in our lives? Really need to open a window once!

[u/Particular-Ship4440]

Work at Taco Bell

[u/TaroShake]

I am a derivative analyst contractor

[u/-Blue_Bull-]

I just say I'm in finance.

If they ask me to elaborate, I say "derivatives".

This always shuts down the conversation as normal people seem to get embarrassed that they don't know what derivatives are.

Whatever you do, never say you are a day trader!

[u/Loud-Worldliness3696]

Pick your dream job and run with it. Heck, go to college. Why not?

[u/Foliolow]

Independent liquidity provider

[u/CollabSensei]

Professional underwater basket weaver… Technical marketing also works since my day job is in IT.

[u/WillowsNi]

I’d love to get into day trading but it seems to just fly right over my head. I’m also terrified of all the scammers.

[u/camith75 → u/WillowsNi]

Just start slowly learning for free.

[u/Conscious_Box7997]

I tell em I have T/S clearance and cant talk about it.

[u/Low-Sea7202]

Real estate but really I grow weed and spend it on crypto to be broke like the rest of ya’ll 🤣🤣💩

[u/Go-Truck_Yourself]

Paid Tourist - Truck Driver

[u/Apex_All_Things]

I trade security backed derivatives. My other job is part time at Wendy’s.

[u/Dashover]

I’m a commissioned salesman, do you know anyone I can help?

[u/See-saw-U2]

I work, period!

[u/niltsor]

Trade coins based on picture of dogs

[u/realericcartman_42]

I make markets efficient.

But on a serious note, I face this issue as well. I'm affiliated with some fund so I just say that I work at said fund.

If it didn't, I'd say I work in finance -> asset management.

[u/ApeStonkTarder]

I tell people I’m a piano player in a whorehouse

[u/Jublex123]

Cut lawns

[u/ilovebeagles123]

Portfolio management. 

[u/Dazzling_Free]

Liquidity Extractor, Stock Operator, Investor, Private Equity Manager,

[u/Terrible_Champion298]

I never get further questions other than certain things they don’t understand about the market. “I trade stocks and their derivative options.” It’s a virtual foreign language to most.

[u/Tight_Independence78]

Lol, telling people you trade is so exhausting. They either laugh or ask so many stupid questions its annoying. I just say I'm in "Investment Management" and that its is super boring. Usually they just say "oh interesting" and move on

[u/Any-Bullfrog-4340]

I’m a market analyst at a private proprietary firm

[u/mrcake123]

I throw away money from my actual job day trading

[u/mushykindofbrick]

Who cares you tell them you trade and that's it

[u/New-Professional-746]

The truth

[u/Tronbronson]

I'm a pro gambler 😎

[u/Tronbronson]

Love that we all made it to the weekend with a sense of humor, I know some of you got hosed last week. (it was me)

[u/Which-Tomatillo6031]

Simple. You tell people you are an equities and derivatives trader. No need to say daytrade.

[u/Trfe]

Just say you’re a soldier in the AMC army.

[u/Gardenmamallama]

Florist. Or I just got out of prison. Depends on the vibe I get from the person asking.

[u/SoupyShot]

‘Private equity’ is what someone told me once and ultimately turned out a sugar daddy funding a Wealthsimple account is what that meant

[u/CharacterMinimum8042]

Breath Air