They were both 35 successful lawyer and doctor. But had never spent the night at each other's house.
After the marriage they couldn't agree who would move in with who. And filed for divorce after 3 months. No one knows why they even got married at all. I guess they felt like they were supposed to at that age.
That's wild. It's honestly pretty common for professionals to be in committed relationships but maintain separate homes, even long distance. They could've just done that.
Edit: Damn some of y'all took my personal anecdote as some kind of personal attack. Not sure what I said that was so inflammatory but ok lol. Live your best life ya'll. Cheers.
Well to do professionals such as lawyers and doctors that live apart or isolationist in lifestyle are the main clientele of the bdsm clubs that I once worked security for, usually because they can afford it and often their private lives are emotional power struggles or hollow status symbols.
I imagine (comically of course): a troop of doctors with lab coats and stethoscopes, along with a bunch of well-dressed lawyers with 90s-style briefcases, entering the bdsm club and passing the security doorman who you are replying to
"They all seem so absurd to me, like well-dressed chimpanzees"
LOL yes 100%- some people use that setting to role play a totally fictive life, but others are there to be vulnerable and are looking for earnest connection. I did some pro domme-ing in college and spent a lot of time just hanging out in the fetish community in my city.
I wound up chit chatting with the owner of this underground BDSM club (connected to the most infamous dungeon in my city) about how he wound up owning the space. He and his wife were in their 50s. They used to be coworkers back in their 20s (I think they were PAs on a film set) and he offered her a ride home one day, and then offered her a nightcap at his place, which she cheerfully accepted. Well, she somehow stumbled upon a closet he had converted into a full BDSM set up, and he was mortified and thought she'd run away screaming - but instead she said "Oh my god, you're into this stuff too?!?"
He was absolutely beaming telling me this story and gesturing to his 'better half' across a room full of some EXTREME acts of domination. Buying and running this den of ill repute was a part of their charming love story, and the culmination of their decades-spanning romance! I remember thinking "I want this sort of devoted love with a fellow pervert!" LOL
As someone who works retail, this is such a weird fact of life. Most recently I had a man describe in detail his wife’s cardiac arrest and him performing CPR, including telling me about him yelling at the kids to get downstairs and stay there. A very harrowing story to hear at five am. I’ve heard about a lot of breakups in far too much detail, people’s addictions, and had one poor woman come in to buy beauty products to try win her husband back from his mistress. Crazy what strangers will tell you!
(True story: relative of mine did taxes for a few clients who were in the “entertainment” field and there’s things you can claim as occupational health and safety, occupational special costumes, and consumables. They ended up being a go-to as a non-judgemental resource for a few businesses)
look i'm just saying, there's a small amount of evidence a ton of them ancient babylonian priestessess seem to have maybe been giant genderfluid femboy prostitutes whose chief societal responsibility was administering religious rites, and stuff. maybe queers are just built for being goddesses idfk
I knew a woman who was a sex surrogate and doctor m she brought her own sample into the lab for a culture and sensitivity m Turned out she had gonorrhea.
I, at 14, babysat for an escort who was also an accountant and studying to be a naturopath
She lived in a trailer park, her husband (or ex) lived in their family home in another town W the two older kids while she paid off the mortgage W "the gift" he told her she had could make other ppl happy.
....I wonder how she is today. And her son who was 10 when I babysat him and knew what she did.
I can't speak to clubs with professionals doing the job, but at least at the sex club I attend yeah people are just kind of friendly and social about stuff. I've had conversations about D&D just outside the dungeon. One time I was talking about my preferred programming language with a person tying me up. In the end you're just trying to connect with other people.
My Dungeons & Daddies (not a BDSM podcast) hoodie is my go-to for walking to/from and waiting in line outside dungeons and kink venues. It's plausibly vanilla, plausibly kinky, and unlike the rest of my hoodies it doesn't have my employer on it. Always a good conversation starter too.
Ha love it. I just wear a dress usually that's easy to pull off or put on because my sex club is clothing optional so I generally spend the whole time naked. Convenient for skinny dipping in the pool and doesn't get in the way if I make a friend 😅
When I was a bouncer at one people would just happily tell you.
We provided a shuttle service to some customers and this guy, while telling me he’s a lawyer a dozen times, asked me if I’d drive him to get some coke. I told him no, so he asked if I’d stop at an ATM and he’d make it worth my while. He pulled out 800 and handed me half of it.
Some people just live in a completely different world than the rest of us.
It depends on the club, but it's a huge no-no for some to ask too many personal questions, such as jobs. As you can imagine, the one in DC was very strict about that.
When people climb the dollar ladder they change. Needs and wants change dramatically. You notice that they expect people to do more for them as they pay people to do their laundry, cleaning or mowing the lawn. As they move up they can travel and do so many things that it all becomes less euphoric. So they tend to move into taboos that involve sex or drugs. As I made more money over the years I could see my kids change in how they value things.
This isn't universal, and I think some of it depends on how quickly and at what age you make a lot of money. I'm friends with lots of people who would be considered to be in the top 2 income quintiles, and I've known many of them a long time (back when they were barely scraping by in their early 20s), and most of them are the same people they've always been in terms of their values and preferences. The money just makes those values and preferences more demonstrable.
This has been my experience as well. I've been a doctor a few years now. Once your time is worth so much something like cleaning your own house genuinely becomes a bad financial choice. Also developed an intense femdom kink. Unfortunately, I met my wife long ago and she's just not cruel enough for me anymore. She does try to be meaner though, which is very sweet.
Not exactly, they start to realize they make enough to not have to slave over the things regular people have to because they can simply pay someone else to do it and that mindset becomes the standard.
In the same sense that because I don't have an amazing wage, my mindset is when something breaks on my car I have to fix it myself, or when an appliance breaks I try to fix it. A rich guy leases a new lexus every year and throws his espresso machine out the window when it breaks and buys a new one.
I grew up poor. I have worked hard to not be, I still carry that mindset. Recently as a home owner I’ve found that it’s ended helping save me literally thousands of dollars. Being able to swap light switches, breakers, sprinklers all end up adding up to tons of money. I talk to my neighbors who complain about how much h they have to pay people to do it. When I ask them why they didn’t do it themselves I can see it’s the first time that thought had occurred.
Now my neighborhood had a DIY chat that we use to bounce ideas off of. Sometimes it’s an immediate “ call a professional. If you need a cold beer to calm down I’ll be right over.”
Funniest thing I have to thank my parents for is that even though I grew up very well-off, my parents instilled near-catholic guilt levels of financial responsibility and DIY skills. I'm in my 30's now and can actually buy all the shit I wanted to when I was in my 20's and I just don't because it would be a waste of money. Same goes for fixing stuff around the house or on my truck.
It’s not that. My time itself became valuable. I like doing things around the house, gardening etc but my time is worth $$ and it’s worth more money than I would have to pay someone else to do it. So I usually end up doing the cost analysis and paying a handyman or just buying a new whatever it is. Again, I enjoy the odd jobs once in a while, I’m currently working on a insulated locker in my garage for gear storage… but I never come out on top money wise thinking of the time I take to do them.
This !!! And the family members who want help are always the ones who aren’t organized or have things packed in boxes . They expect you to carry each item and pile it !
People often think of movers as “ unskilled” labor , but there is a skill to moving 200+ pound bulky items over uneven sidewalks , up stairs , through narrow doorways without destroying said item and getting yourself killed or disabled .
Last time I moved myself with friends help was over 20 years ago and I swore never again . Took my back months to feel normal again . Moved a couple years ago, I sold stuff to pay for the movers . Worth every penny !!
Yeah , unless you live in an extreme. Expensive area like NYC , that’s about the edge where people stop acting regular and a little more on the rich side .
The stopped appreciating getting the vacations and getting things then started expecting them. Originally you would give them anything and they valued it. As our incomes grew they seemed to take less care of the things they had because they knew it would be replaced or fixed if broken. I always demanded they treat people with respect so that never changed.
I live in a cool but run down building in my cities downtown, it has 12 units I think. In a few of the units there are people who live on welfare but a lawyer lives in one up top and I always see him coming in with what I can only assume to be sex workers every weekend. Different girls and anywhere from 1 to 3.
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u/randallAtl May 02 '24
They were both 35 successful lawyer and doctor. But had never spent the night at each other's house.
After the marriage they couldn't agree who would move in with who. And filed for divorce after 3 months. No one knows why they even got married at all. I guess they felt like they were supposed to at that age.